Hyacinth Markings
by littlehero
Summary: Rin is not Rin, but at the same time, she is. Hell, she's reincarnated into Naruto. Watch how she defies her own fate and change the Narutoverse by her hidden power of fucking things up. [RINNOHARA!OC] [FRONTLINER!RIN]
1. 1 life in death

Chapter One

It was a normal day, as far as I was concerned. Go to the private academy for kids with high-profile parents from 7 in the morning until 1 in the afternoon. Grab lunch with my mother, then head straight to my father's work place. Then, from 2 in the afternoon until 8 in the evening, train until I almost drop dead. That was exactly what happened. One minute, I was wobbling towards the stands where my instructor and medicine were, before losing my balance. Said instructor rushed over to me and found out I was having rapidly dying.

It happened so fast.

The anaesthesia didn't work properly. Someone messed up in their job. I woke up in the middle of my heart surgery, and promptly went into shock. The world slowly darkened, everything becoming a messy blur to me, my lungs crying for oxygen. Then it dawned on me, I was going to die, no mistaking it. It angered me, having to die just when I was starting to fight for it. Then the anger turned to disappointment, I knew I still had so much unfinished work.

So many people to help, so many promises to fulfill. So little chance to do all that. The disappointment turned into sadness. I felt my heart start to spasm, and I had no idea where I would end up. I was a pretty normal person, some would call an anti-social, some an introvert. I had no one to call my best friend or a friend, but I did have a pet bird. A Hyacinth Macaw with a missing toe, named Muscari, in tribute to the flowers I grew in my father's little garden. I had no prior relationships, outside of my biological and oath family.

I was but a simple 12th grade repeater, with a slightly superior brain, and an extremely weak heart. A blur shuffled to where I lay, heart spasming, time seemed so slow. I hear my father's voice, stern but heart-broken. No, don't cry for me, father. Do not let me pass in pain, I wanted to say, in retribution for failing to meet the famiglia's standards. He heard my plea, holding my face with his clammy hand. Maybe that's why my doctor was ordered to leave me be.

Maybe God would let me enter Heaven? Maybe not, I was, after all, a child of a sinful man. I would be such a hypocrite if I held such inhibitions in myself. I accept it. I was a son of a newly chosen consigliere of quite the influential famiglia. It must mean I was also an evil person. It was human nature to assume that 'the fruit does not fall far from the tree'. But I was not the son my famiglia wanted me to be. It was nature for the human mind to kill the weak and rejoice in the power of the strong. In my world, those who were born into this life were expected to excel, to take after strong parents, to take the expectations in stride.

A strong grip held my numbing hand, I struggled to see. My father, in a broken voice, told me he was sorry. I felt the familiar coldness of my father's other son, his precious Ruger LCP, press into my forehead. I smiled in sadness. I am sorry, he repeated over and over again.

I did not believe him.

Maybe if he really was sorry, he would have taken the chance to take me out of my misery, to stop the pain, to end it all then. His shaking hand retracted along with the gun, and his warm hand eased his grip on me. His blurry form turned away from me, and walked away.

Maybe if he really was sorry, he would have pulled the trigger, instead of turning his back to me. I succumbed to the darkness, embracing the cold arms of death in return. My mind flashed a memory of myself searching a flower with a meaning of sincerity and sorrow, with which I decided I wanted to grow in my father's garden. Purple hyacinths to display my apologies for not meeting the famiglia's expectations. I wanted to show that I was indeed sorry for being born this way, and that I will forever be.

I'm sorry father.

* * *

It was warm. It was warm and soft. Quite humid, but comfortable. There was nothing I could see, as far as I was concerned. There was a constant thrumming everywhere, but it was very comforting, gave me something to focus on while I remain immobile. Perhaps my father changed his mind and my doctor managed to evolve into a miracle worker and prolonged my life? I may have to wait until I was once again mobile enough to move. I tried to move myself and found out that, no, I did not have the strength to move anything. I swallowed back a sigh and entertained the thoughts that polluted my head. I was sure I died, or at least was dead for a few seconds. Or was it days? I did not know, I only gained consciousness in random intervals.

It was boring.

But I was thankful to not hear the incessant beeping of a machine in a hospital room. There was the perpetual silence, and the unabated darkness. It was quite unnerving, but at the same time, I sought solace in the welcomed silence. I was free, and my thoughts were also free as could be. The darkness and the feeling of being alone gave me time to think. And think I did. All the philosophical questions I have had inside my brain I repeated over and over until I thought my head hurt. It grew quite very boring in fact, and I was certain it has been a few days since I had been bought to the hospital. I reminisced my time with my mother, laughing as she talked to me about her airplane themed cafe, booming in business as it remained one of a kind in wherever she decided to have it. I reminisced the very rare times my father taught me how to shoot a gun himself. It made my heart ache and I stopped thinking before I get another failure.

I entertained the more childish side of my thoughts. Adventure Time had just finished a few days before I was rushed to the hospital. I was quite happy there was an LGBTQ moment in the end. Yay for them. It was also a few days before that the BTS x Nicki 'Idol' music video was released. It was alright, even better than the original, I guess. Nicki is a queen and BTS is quite the inspirational group. I hope my father does not cancel my bulk album orders. I was planning on distributing them. I hope he is doing alright, coping with my sudden hospitalization. I also hope he takes care of Muscari. I forgot to buy him his new sweaters.

He used his old ones eight times already. I hope father does not put him down because he has a missing toe. I hope he and mother cease their useless arguments and just get back together. I hope someone tells them that they could just buy a relationship mending book or get couples therapy. They both have the money anyways. Mac Miller died a few days (I would assume, as I had only heard from my classmates about his death, the day I also had a run in with Death himself) ago. I hope people don't blame that little girl, Ariana, for what happe-

A poke. And another one. And another. And another. Until the thrumming stopped. All was quiet, and with bated breath, I force my stiff yet jelly-like body to move. But someone beat me to it. I was being pushed out of my safe haven and I was beginning to feel so constricted. It hurt, everything just felt like it was being crushed and pushed and scratched. White hot, hot pain traveled everywhere and I struggled to breathe. There was the confusing temperature, where one second I was cold and the other uncomfortably warm, my eyes unable to open. Was this the start of my punishment in hell? I stopped fighting the force pulling and pushing me, opting to stay still as huge hand-like shaped things wrapped around my body, undoubtedly scratching me with such coarse and rough surfaces. I was being dragged and scratched and I burst out crying. My ears were met with a shrill cry and I figured that must be me, what with not speaking for a few days, they must understand my sudden need for delicate handling. They wrapped me in a scratchy cloth and I snuggled in it for the warmth it provided, absolutely tired from what just transpired.

I heard someone humming in my ear before I was put down into a soft but sturdy surface, my pro tempore blindness preventing me from seeing just where I was put and who handled me. It was but only a few measly seconds before I succumbed to the darkness once again.

* * *

The second time I regained my consciousness, I knew I was not dead. Swaddled up in slightly scratchy blankets and a very, very bright light in front of me, I figured I was in a state of consciousness but still not conscious enough to be able to move. Strangely enough, my chest and heart felt fine, unlike before, where I was always out of breathe even from just standing up. I always would know if something changes regarding my heart, and right now, it felt different. I felt like it was mine, yes, but at the same time it did not. My heart was weak and sloppy and sick, but this heart that was beating inside my chest was very much strong and consistent, no irregular heartbeats, no stopping every two to 5 minutes of exercise and most importantly, it felt fine. Just fine. That is not the case with the heart I was born with. A thought made my blood run cold and I burst into tears with wild abandon, not caring if somebody else heard me. Footsteps rushed to my room and I forced my head to look to the side, mouth already failing to form the words I want to say.

There, in the door, was a blurry figure, wearing what seemed like a Japanese or Korean traditional wear, dark colored and was big enough to make the person wearing it appear very muscular. Upon seeing my frazzled state, he rushed over to me and peered down my crib. He bent down close enough that I see markings on his face, purple, and one on each side of his cheeks.

"Ba!" I yelped as he moved my head so I was looking straight ahead. Wait...

Peered down? Crib? I gaped at him as he poked my body with his index finger, gently nudging my mouth close.

"Rin-chan?"

Oh no.

I am not ashamed to say that I passed out, once again.

* * *

The third time, I regained consciousness, all I saw was white. Maybe I died for real? It was hard to tell, what with my eyes refusing to cooperate with me. My body was numb, and the back of my hand was itching. It must be quite the spectacle, seeing a consigliere's defective son laying on a crib, for a baby. This is scary, I must have been kidnapped and sold to an old geezer with a weird fetish. I sigh inwardly, knowing that I might as well try to kill myself for real once I find a way to move my body. Everyone knows a mafia's goldmine of information is the Boss' family, and the consigliere's. Sometimes even people below the Capos are in the know. But this here? A blatant sign of not only a threat, but also a very big 'fuck you' to both my father and the Boss. I must move.

All my plans were thrown out the window when a man, (who was probably almost eight feet tall) loomed over my crib, white hair falling on his shoulders, before cascading over the crib's side. Big, slightly tanned hands ran through my forehead, my eyes crossing each other to follow it, before a deep laugh erupted out of his mouth. I tried my best to frown at him, but ultimately failing because of the wart on his nose. It made the man laugh a little longer before straightening up, fixing his hitai-ate and waving good bye at me. His back turned towards me and I stopped smiling. He... He had quite the similar body structure as my father, and all it did was hurt my already fragile heart.

I started to cry.

Immediately, I was in his arms, warmth blooming in my chest as he cooed at me and pat my back. I stopped crying. His shoulders shook and his chest rumbled as he kept in his chortles in, a very beautiful woman with blonde hair rushing inside the room looking panicked, but soon turned to a fond smile. Why were they looking so familiar? I racked my brain of any memories involving white haired man with a wart. Wait, was it a wart or a piercing? I did not see enough of his face. Hold on, white hair, tall ass man, nose piercing, hitai-ate, a blondie, wait... No, no no no. This man is a legend.

Jiraiya.

The man holding me is Jiraiya. As in Jiraiya of the Sannin. As in Jiraiya, _Jiraiya._ Lord Jiraiya.

So that woman is Tsunade.

What god took pity on me and gave me such a blessed second life? I giggled, held onto him tighter, before it literally hit me, that I was in Naruto. And I remember someone calling me Rin. I take back my earlier sentiments. Some god out there must be laughing at me.

For the third time in this life, I passed out.

Lord, help me.


	2. 2 post humous

Chapter Two

It felt like a dream. Everything blurred too fast and too much for my still confused brain. There were so many major events that make me squeamish and there are also ones that make me hopeful for the future.

Allow me to elaborate what had happened in the span of three to five months.

One of the former events were the deaths of my parents, the man who first peeked over my crib, was found dead as a medic camp was raided, where as my mother died of child birth. The thrumming stopped exactly when my mother died and the poking was the doctors trying to determine if I was still alive. I had been born to a dead woman. It made me want to scrub myself clean, because even if she was my mom, I had no real connection to her. She was just a woman that had conceived me, and the man, who was supposed to be my father, was just a fleeting memory. In this world, I am an orphan. I could live with that, since no one could replace my only parents.

Another one of the former events were the start of the beginning of ROOT initiation. Or at least the makings of it. Kids as young as myself and orphans (also like myself) were being taken to who-knows-where and no one seems to bat an eye. It was scary.

A good event did come by, and I was overjoyed. Tsunade has examined me for any type of diseases, and only last week had she confirmed my theory. My heart was perfectly fine, and very healthy. Due to my parents' genes, I had quite the immune system, and my body was perhaps one of the few babies that could live without vaccines here, except for the jinchuuriki and the occasional child with parents who are very meticulous with what they consume and their lifestyle. It was great knowing I would not drop dead because of exhaustion over here.

Second semi-good news was that, in Naruto's canon plot line, Rin was a female. However, may I say that because I felt quite thankful for the second chance at life, some god out there decided to give me something I could praise them about. No offence to women out there, I have no problems with being a girl, but I am more comfortable living with a male reproductive organ than with a female reproductive system and bleed almost every month. I have not retained my precious body part and because of that, I do not rejoice in Jashin's name. I categorize me being a female good news as I have not yet messed the plot line.

It would be of good use if I can manage to use my new and improved body to live a little more longer than last time, on both accounts of my life and Rin's tragic and even shorter one.

Meanwhile, Jiraiya and Tsunade, together with their still-Konoha-nin teammate, Orochimaru, were tasked to check up on the orphans and seek out the ones who were a possible candidate for a shinobi lifestyle and who was not. Seems quite the move for the supposed peacekeeping village, but I guess the so called 'peace' is not as easily attained as one would think.

The people under the category 'shinobi' were also expected to excel over here, although on a much grander scale. It was terrifying, as it brought out memories I rather put to rest than reminisce, and it made me rethink this life's direction. I could just choose to be a civilian, where I may not be able to protect myself in battle, but I do prevent the death of Rin, where it would, in turn, might (this word makes me so anxious), it just might prevent Obito from losing his mind. Although on the other hand, if I was a candidate for a lifestyle like the majority of the characters in Naruto, I may just have to take the original route Rin took.

There were expectations, after all, be it kid or not, female or male. It was expected for one to fight for his life, but here, it was expected for one to fight not for his life, but the honor and power of one's village. It was a huge contest of who was more powerful, who had more feared shinobi in their side, who was more famous and who was more feared among the the Five Great Villages, it was a wonder why this temporary peace came to be, considering all of them are indeed power-hungry. It was exactly like my old life, albeit on a much deadlier world. It was perhaps one of the comforts I could find in this death-ridden place, where one may not survive until the age of his late twenties, that the structure and the ins and outs of the villages were very similar, almost identical, to the underground's mafia.

Where back in my old life, I was but a child of a consigliere, but here, I was privileged. Consiglieres were the, if I am right, the equivalent to an Elder or a council member, where as the Boss, (or in some cases, the Don) is the Kage. The Underboss are the equivalent of the heads of the different divisions inside the organization, like for example, the Head of the Torture and Investigation, who, by all means, must report only to the Kage they serve. Under the Underboss are the Capo, or the Clan heads. They have the right to lead and the privilege to speak with the Kage but are not always humoured. Under the Capo are the foot men, where the shinobi who serve the village come into the picture. Very rarely do these men, back in my world, are let in on very special information privy just only to the higher ups. Although much more often than not, here, people are always in the know. Last are the associates, those who do not work under the Boss but are most commonly the information dealers, the suppliers and what not, and may be simply compared to the civilians and merchants and tourists here in the Narutoverse. Simply put, the structure of the Village and a Mafia organisation is quite similar, if not identical. That thought alone gives me quite the comfort in the midst of all these bad things that are fated to happen. (Oh goodness, I sound like Neji there for a second.)

The first of all my problems, was how exactly I was supposed to go plan this life out until Rin's supposed death. I had only watched quite a few of the episodes more than twice, and have always watched them once in order to finish the whole Naruto (not yet Shippuden, mind you) in under a few months, as I am always busy with my training and trying to keep up with it. I had no reassurance that I could remember every single detail as I am not a quote _narutard_ unquote as some call themselves. I simply watch the show in search for something that stimulates the mind quite well, and anime certainly does. I am quite appreciative, perhaps even outright happy and thankful, that I had somehow landed in a world where the story and it's character roster are ones that I am familiar with, and also with utmost horror, what with me still being a goldmine of precious information.

Now before you accuse me of being quite the assuming person, Rin was, and is, quite the key character in this mess of a story. I would not risk having her die so early in the story (as this is also my life now, after all) since it make the over all plot so much more different than before. Her death was the catalyst of it all, really, so I must plan everything for the next thirteen years so I may live as old as Kakashi. I would like that, I smile to myself, as I imagined myself growing old and having my own garden and another pet bird. It seemed like such a hard life to imagine, but I think I would do much better if I had the chance to change things hands on. I simply could not let pass the chance to utilise this new body to its fullest potential, despite the risks and the inevitable death in this line of work. I died once, I can face death again.

So I tried to feel for the same exact thrumming I felt for the first time I woke up (or rather became conscious in the womb) in this world, trying to follow what those fanfictions have written out. Then I realized, those were fanfictions, a work of the mind and not from someone's experience. It was a foolhardy thought process, trusting people who have not experienced it for themselves. I sigh in annoyance. I ought to give myself an award, so much for a slightly superior brain.

I figured I would leave the chakra experiments alone while I focused on my physical being, also remembering that forcing and messing with chakra at such a young age without someone watching over the process (or maybe there was someone watching me, one of Danzo's first men) else I damage the chakra system inside of me. It was hard, as the experience was tempting, but it was far more so that I retain the ability to use chakra flawlessly like Rin did as a medic nin than try it out now and not be able to transfer Obito's eye to Kakashi's.

Instead, I tried to get my limbs to work and move how I envisioned them to flail about, feeling the contents inside my crib. For one, it was not as hard as I made it sound, flailing your arms and legs around when you're an infant, but it doesn't mean it did not suck you dry of energy. It was very tiring. A black figure moved from my peripheral vision and I froze, before said figure went towards me and I panicked.

Pale hands grasped my own tiny slightly less pale ones and a soft coo came out Orochimaru's lips. His expensive looking yukata was soft to the touch, even to my delicate hands, I thought as my hand got a feel of it. He seemed so different from the anime and I thought about how much grief this village must have given him for the man to turn his back and do these experiments. Something snapped, I realized, as he seemed so gentle and different from the show that portrayed him as the scientist without any human morals. Something or someone pushed him over the edge.

He was, _is_ , needing help. His forefinger poked at my hands and I wrap a grubby fist around it, in an effort to hold him back. A small smile bloomed on his lips and he leaned against the side of my crib.

" _You'd better be a taijutsu specialist, what with your grip strength."_ He chuckled as I flashed him a confused look, with me not knowing or understanding what it is that he just said. He stayed with me for a couple more minutes before the exhaustion finally caught up with me. He smiled, small as it may be, but a smile all the same. I let out a yawn. He hummed. The last feeling I felt was a hand wiggling to escape my grip before I fell into a dreamless sleep.

ㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡ

I woke up to the sound of a crying baby, before opting to just try and get some more sleep. Days passed into weeks and weeks turned into months. The first five months of my life was uneventful and quiet, perhaps too quiet, I thought as I forced my body to roll over and bury my head into the pillow provided in my miniature bed. The Legendary Sannin (all three of them) visited way less and I saw them almost once a month, sometimes just once for two months. I was nearing nine months old, and I was quite mobile, compared to the other children who were only just starting to want to move about. I was already pushing myself to stand on my own two feet before tumbling down, timing my progress. Know could stand up without help for a grand total of one third of a minute. It was a huge leap from 12 seconds. I was proud. This body has also been quite the glutton one, stomach aching for food quite often, in fact, more often than the other kids. I was always either drinking my formula, sleeping or trying to walk or crawl about.

I was given a new bed, one with low railings, seeing as more babies needed the cribs more than I did. It was quite the distressing moment when I learnt of what they did, expecting a child to not fall off of a surface with such a low barrier to prevent said child from falling. Although I was technically an adult now, I still am inside a baby's body (they don't even know I'm an adult in mind) and therefore they still need to practice caution. I might fall off and twist something, or worst case scenario, break a bone. I specifically don't want that to happen with my neck. I felt a shudder run down my spine. I quickly lay myself flat on my back on the bed. So much for trying to move.

Someone, somewhere in the room, snickered. I turned my head around and saw one of the caretakers, a woman whose name I keep butchering when I say it out loud, walked over to where my bed was and crouched so she was eye level.

"Totuka?" _Totsuka_ merely nodded in appreciation, seeing I was still the only one not giving the care givers head ache. She was quite the quiet person, opting to use gestures rather than speak more often than not.

She pat her stomach and then tilted her head, in a silent question of ' _hungry?_ '. I nod and she put the universal sign for wait, up and went to where the baby formulas were and heated some for me. She was kind, quite aloof and doesn't like skinship, but is quite the storyteller. Her features were nondescript and quite similar to an Inuzuka, resembling Tsume more and more when she just faced forward and does nothing, although with a whole lot less aggression and face tattoos.

You could say she was pretty, but not in a traditional way like Mikoto Uchiha was. She was a feral beauty, her features strong and quite sharp in most areas. She was also my favorite caregiver as she doesn't push me to go play with the other children. Bonus points when she reads me books and follows it with her fingers so I could associate this and that with that and this. She was very hands on in teaching me and I was wondering why she's rather take care of babies than teach at the Academy, I'm pretty sure they would certainly like her there.

She came back a few moments later and let me drink from the bottle myself. I am an independent child, thank you very much. She left quietly, also a trait I really like about her, and I was once again left on my own. I had my own books, courtesy of Orochimaru when he visits the orphanage on the off chance that he gets a day off or time before he was thrust into another mission. I had writing books and children's books but all of them were only ever teaching me of deep words and I absolutely cannot use them in real life. Who expects a child, barely a year old, to understand such deep terms? I would be dubbed quite the freak if I knew things that most kids did not know about.

Besides, I had more pressing matters to attend to. Like how I was supposed to go about and go do Rin's thing. How was I supposed to Rin? It was confusing. It was hard to plan when you know someone is bound to know when you do something out of the ordinary. Someone like Danzo. It was another day where I achieved and finished nothing, taking not even a single step towards my goal. I surrendered to sleep once again.

ㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡ

The first time I had been given the right for village excursion was when I turned two and a half years old. At this point in my new life, I had become an expert in climbing the high places a child should definitely keep their distance with, but my more adventurous desires as a man in my old life surfaced. Of course, I am _the_ man, as I struggled not even a bit, albeit a little winded, from climbing dangerous places such as cabinets and book shelves. This specific excursion was a breathtaking experience, what with meeting new people and seeing the grand sights of the wonderful, hypocritical village of Konoha.

I knew War would wound people but such reaction would either mean it was that bad or they were overreacting. It may be rude for me to say this but holding onto bad memories would only push them to find a scapegoat for all their future mistakes. Take for example, Naruto. The little guy had no control whatsoever with what transpired that night, and he sure as hell would not have wanted it were there other options. I sigh. If only Rin was not so infatuated with Kakashi then, she would have seen how Obito cared for her. Besides, opting to go for a kid younger than her when she, herself, was also a kid? And going after a socially and emotionally inadept child too? Bad move.

She could have just went with Obito, who, was not only her age, not only had eyes only for her but also risked the world for her. He was so ready to build a world of full of lies and deception off of the misunderstandings her actions produced and now _I_ had to fix things because _I_ promised myself that _I wanted to live_ until I die of old age, to choose to live because I was graciously given a second life. I sigh inwardly and opt to hold Totsuka's hand tighter as I struggled to keep up with her fast walking pace. We were walking around the market (we split up with three other caretakers to buy different things and to make the work faster), my eyes roaming the slightly outdated style the houses had, the blue sky and the unpolluted surroundings were like a breath of fresh air. Get it? Okay.

The streets were filled with people, some smiling, some laughing, but all I could see was a sea of mourning men and women, hearts filled with darkness and grief. I saw fake smiles and forced laughter. I assume some might think I was a person without consideration and tact but that's the truth. Death is an art of life, but let us also remember that life blossoms from death. Every negative action has a positive counterpart. There was, and is, no use mourning for the people that fought and gave their life for you, and would probably want you to be happy and honor them by living life to the fullest, instead of being all emo and angsty like a certain person. Plus, there is this thing called 'moving on'. It's been a few years already. It's supposed to be healed, the wounds, by now.

People keep acting like scars keep hurting after it's healed.

No, it doesn't hurt. You, as a person, believe it does still, because you want to wallow in that hurt. You don't snap out of it, you don't help yourself. I know how hard it is to keep yourself locked by your own restraints, it can be suffocating. It takes time to heal. Yes, it does. But if you tell a wound you inflicted to yourself to heal itself, what did you achieve? Help yourself. If you cannot do it on your own? Find help, there is nothing wrong with wanting to get better and seeking help to better yourself.

I have been thinking for the past few months I did not have anything to do. I thought long and hard about what my decisions and current life will entail. I thought about my life, my first life, thinking I was a failure when I fact, if I had only looked, my father was proud. He knew I was giving my best, but what did I choose to do? Wallow in self pity. Did it make matters better? No. Did it make things worse? Absolutely. Am I working to move on? Yes. Because scars will never be erased but they will always _heal_. Things were the same in both universes, fiction or not.

Life will always blossom after death. It was how things work. Sure, I had been reincarnated as a character in what was supposed to be a fictional world but what difference did it make? I was still alive and I had a chance to redeem myself. Don't get me wrong, I had my fair share of deaths under my name. Death by protecting me. Death for invading my privacy. Yes, I have a lot of those. But I would redeem myself anyways. Sure, I did not share the same pain as they do, but that's why there is change and forgiveness. I looked around me and saw broken hearts and well made masks, and I resolved to change the way things are. I promised myself that day that I would help any way I can, because one world may be dark and evil, but another world doesn't have to necessarily be the same. Change always starts slow, but it doesn't mean you're doing nothing.

I bumped into a little, kiddie Obito that day.

I had expected our first meeting to either be in class or in the hallway where _the_ incident, where Obito developed a crush on Rin, happened. It certainly was not pleasant to know that they may or may not have met this early in canon. I almost sighed in amusement as Totsuka was thrown off guard and stopped haggling with one vegetable dealer before she looked between Obito and I.

Eyes, round and wide stared at me as he wobbled slightly, still holding onto the small bags of groceries he carried, an older couple and a woman behind him. They all called out his name as he rammed into me when he looked back at them, driving me to the floor on my back, dirtying my clothes. A hand was immediately in front of my face, and I looked up. There, Totsuka was, holding her hand out for me. Understanding was in her eyes. She was not angry at Obito for bumping into me. There already was change happening.

"Ah! Sorry!" He squeaked out as Totsuka's indifferent stare was directed at him. Behind him were the three other Uchiha who were looking quite apologetic, as much as an Uchiha could look anyways. As it looked like the three were looking uncomfortable with Totsuka staring right _at_ them, I stood up and pat the dirt off of my clothes. She wasn't angry, else she would have dragged Obito and scolded him.

"It's okay. I'm sorry for not dodging you." I say as I bow to the three who were looking at me like I was some kind of child with _angel_ written in cursive on my forehead. The woman snapped out of it first and introduced herself to Totsuka, before introducing the elderly couple. She nudged Obito to introduce himself before gently prying the grocery bags from his arms.

He turned to me, ears red as he shyly introduced himself.

"Uchiha Obito. Nice to meet you." I smiled, not because I found him cute but because it made it far more easier for me to just integrate myself in his life early on and teach him a few stuff.

"Rin Nohara." He grinned back at me and I couldn't help but grin back. He was seriously a heart attack and a ball of sunshine all in one. He stepped back and the woman nudge her again, before he apparently remembered to bow. It was very sloppy though.

I bowed back, albeit on a much more sedate pace. Totsuka then excused us both, nodding in acknowledgment towards the three Uchiha adults, and shooting Obito a small smile. He didn't see it though, as we were still in a battle of stares. He wouldn't turn his gaze away so I did not mine, in a challenge or just for the sake of plain staring, I don't know.

We continued on our way. I didn't expect Obito to remember me, that much was sure, as he only probably remembered Rin as the kind girl who gave him his files. His conscious must have forgotten about Rin, ( _Me, a small voice whispered quietly in my head_ ) sometime along the way. It was alright though, as I was the kind of person that was trying to play saviour. I would save him.

So I started to display my superior intellect, utilising the books Orochimaru had given me all those years ago, using them to improve my rather small vocabulary at the time. I sneaked past the Orphanage gate guards every after lunch, and tag along a random person until I reach the library. There, I would use my climbing skills to reach books that I could use to bring my intellect up. It was quite the experience giving random nin heart attacks when they see me climb the book shelves. By this time, I was only days away from turning three, and by the time I did reach said age, I had accidentally discovered how to call on my chakra.

It was quite the normal day (it always starts out like this, doesn't it? I thought so too) if you tune out the howling of the wind and the pitter patter of the rain on the roofs of the library. I had just come inside the building (quite wet but there were towels at the front desk provided for the civilians who came in to take shelter, Konoha is weird like that) and dried myself off. I, ever thirsty for knowledge in this world, went off and climbed the Elemental Nations History section in an effort to read the history of Konoha. It was then where I remembered I did not thoroughly dried myself, my feet and the slippers I wore still slippery from the water. My foot slipped on the fourth level of the shelves and took a few books out of the it place. I scrambled to hold on and then it happened.

Somehow, I got stuck to the third shelf by the knee. I really don't know how I managed to do that, but it was, as it turned out alright. If you don't count me having to cry for help out in the _library_. Immediately some ninja with a stick up their ass came to scold me and was as shocked as I was when they laid their eyes upon my figure that was glued by the knee on the book shelve.

It was Fugaku Uchiha. Now, it was probably a given that silence is reinforced by someone that works in the library, but to have someone ( _a clan head, future or not_ ) come and scold me was an achievement. It was as if I was important enough for them to personally come and reprimand me. I sniff and stare at him. Why do I keep meeting Uchihas anyways? That's the fifth person from their clan I have met in just the span of 3 weeks. Don't I have the right to get to see other clan members? Specifically Inuzukas. (I love dogs.)

He sighed and put a hand on my shoulder, trying to pull me gently off the shelf. Key word, try. I was still stuck to it as though someone glued me down. Or welded. I was still stuck after three minutes of him trying to pull me out, even resorting to using his Sharingan for a full minute to observe what just transpired. He sighed again. I grinned, another achievement. He looked like he was literally seconds from just ripping me off of it. He glanced at me and I held his gaze.

Then he face palmed.

"Cut off your chakra, child." He said, before crossing his arms. I tilted my head. I didn't even know how I got chakra to stick me to the shelf, I most certainly did not know how to cut it off from my knee. It just happened.

Without warning, his hand moved and the world blacked out.

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When I came to be, I was sitting on a chair in the middle of the library. The librarian, a chūnin (how did I know? _Uniform_ ) I soon recognised as a Nara, was busy trying to keep himself awake. Fugaku Uchiha was nowhere to be seen. Perhaps he just knocked me out and left me on a table to replenish the chakra I wasted on sticking myself onto the shelf. If we were to go by my standards, I would say knocking a three year old out as a means to stop their chakra flow would be a 4 out of 10. He could have just told me instructions to cut the flow or just simply taught me how to by demonstrating it to me. Very rude. But very considerate all the same. At the very least, he did not leave me slumping on the side of a book shelf, alone.

I shook the needles off of my feet and legs as they had fallen asleep. Springing up as my gaze landed on the clock (that read 5:30 pm) I ran out the library as fast as I could, pulling a few muscles but nothing Totsuka can not heal. I put a hand on my chest as the other grip my knees, struggling to breathe. I pulled a few more breaths in and once again ran, but on a much more slower pace as to not trigger anothe bout of that breathlessness.

The Orphanage was a pretty place, (let us play a drinking game. Drink a shot every time I mention Orphanage ;) ) although the people living in it may inspire pity in one's heart. It was comfortable and not at all luxurious and at some points in the year becomes quite cramped because of the newcomers but the building itself was just right. It was home but not, as you share it with people you don't even know or never talked to even once. It was a space where you bond with the people with the same state as you and you help each other out in times of need. It was a place where life long friends were made and then later on became your family, because you had no one else beside the people who understood the pain you went through. Take for example, even if you were "bullied" by some kids _inside_ the Orphanage, they'd have your back and keep you from trouble in the outside. Very twisted but I'd like to think positive and not label myself a pessimist.

Perhaps that was why I often just smiled and tried to understand why some of the children, those who had stayed far more longer than I had in the Orphanage, hate the newcomers. I had a suspicion that it may be because of the lack of attention that was once directed at them, labelling the caretakers as theirs, and think of the new ones as competitions. That was one problem here in this diamond in the rough. Contrary to popular belief, the Orphanage only received annual stipend, and not monthly. That was why it was severely understaffed, because the pay was always at the end of the year and you can't just back out once you did get the job. It is always considerate of the children already in the Orphanage and their needs but does not always give extra for the foreseeable new comers. It drags the funds lower and does not replenish it.

Maybe that was why I automatically moved when my eyes landed on a kid a little older than me, knees scraped and bloodied, and a shrill scream erupted out of a child just infront of the Orphanage gates. There were another three kids, in front of them, and I bet they were kids with families and could not understand why we were here.

The sole of my feet hit the smallest kid's lower back, he was probably older than me, stuck for a few seconds using chakra (at this point I was not surprised with how easily controlling the foreign substance came to me, considering Rin's supposed affinity with the medical arts), used him as a propeller and twisted my body so my foot's transverse arch hit another kid's knees (he was the tallest, stop laughing) and he immediately snapped his eyes to look at me as he fell to his hands and knees. He bared his teeth in what was supposed to be an intimidating smile, and I stood there, calmly staring at him.

The kid with the bloodied knees, let's just name him Knee, gave a startled gasp as he drank the sight in front of him frantically. Quickly, he pulled the child behind him to retreat to the safety of the gates ( _The walls keep us safe from the titans, a voice at the back of my head said_ , I snorted out loud) and left me alone to feed to the wolves. Oddly enough, I seem to have retained the ability to just stare blankly at people like I was dead inside, without blinking, until they get very uncomfortable and leave. It was great. I felt very refreshed.

I walked over to the two people behind the Orphanage walls (are you still playing the drinking game? I bet you're already knocked out.) and grinned. Knee was not with the kid earlier, but with Totsuka. Knee's knees were already healed, and Totsuka was looking positively livid, if her bunched up brows and frown were of any indication.

She looked me over and stared at me, pleasantly surprised. I shot her a grin. She hit the top of my head, lightly grinding her knuckle on the crown of my very fragile head. She didn't seem to care and I let her be. She let me go and after checking me for the last time, went to go back inside. Knee was standing shyly, averting his eyes as we both just stood awkwardly in front of the gates.

"Thank you." He squeaked and ran off and I stared at his rapidly retreating form as he ran to the side of the Orphanage, a shortcut to the backyard playground. I whispered a curt 'you're welcome' into the air, rubbing my hands together. A voice pulled me out of my thoughts and I turned around to search for it.

I was positively beaming when I spot my three favorite people approaching the gates. Tsunade, Jiraiya and Orochimaru were back.

I had so much to show off. Heh.

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Rin's current age: 3

Obito: 4

Totsuka: 19

Sannin: idk, Kishimoto hates clear timelines

Kakashi: i think he's still a sperm? idk


	3. 3 cucumber

Reply to Guest:

Cindaypop

Kakashi is actually younger by four or three years. The Kakashi Gaiden actually confirmed the fan theory that he is actually 9-10 years old. Obito was about 12-13 years old at that time. He, Obito, fought Minato when he was about 17 or 18 while Kakashi was 13-14 during the Kyūbi attack. Hope I made it somewhat clear. :) (I'm pretty sure this one's legit, and if it's not, let's just pretend that such is the case in this story ;) )

Reply to gruntsbreeder

Thank you, I try!

Reply to chloemika

I hope the second chapter answered your questions! If not, please message me so I can explain!

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Chapter 3

I stood infront of Jiraiya, arms infront of my fragile, three year old body. A few leaves were half-dangling, half-fluttering from my opened palms, and he snickered as another leaf fell off. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. Tsunade found the Head Matron and went out to go drinking, and Orochimaru had disappeared, all those happened in the span of 75 seconds. That was the time where I had manage to rope the Toad Sage to watch me show off my new found ability, and he watched with amusement as I puff up with pride when I manage to keep most of the leaves glued to my palms. He was busy showing off too, as his right hand had leaves dancing on top of his palm, while the other picked at his ear, all the while he slumped against a tree outside the Orphanage gates. I hit his cheek with as much force I could muster.

He didn't even flinch.

"Compared to Tsunade-hime, that hit's a 2 over a hundred. Ya still got a long, long way to go." He said after snorting, and continued making the leaves dance on top of his palm. I dropped the leaves and slumped next to him, pulling my knees to my chest and curling up.

"But for a kid your size, you definitely can slap a fly dead." He said as an afterthought as he eyed me from the side of his vision, blatantly and effectively mocking me as he used the leaves on his palm to spell out the word 'fly'. I grinned and turned to look at the other way.

I sniffed and leaned on him. He tensed up immediately, and I felt his muscles relax when I stayed in the same position, just leaning on him but not directly touching him. He sighed and relaxed against me, head tilting so he could gaze at the cloudless sky.

"We'll be seeing you no more, kid." He said so suddenly and I froze. "No more?" He nodded, and pursed his lips. The sun was beginning to set and the atmosphere became cold, became distant. "No more." I moved a little bit so I was sitting in front of him. He looked down at me and raised a brow. "Why no more?" He sighed and thought for a few seconds before opting to say what was on his mind.

"We were tasked to scout out kids who are candidates to become shinobi. The deadline is today, or rather, later, at 6 in the evening. We'll be going outside the country to scout Amegakure too." He said and I just stared at him. Ame? Why does that sound so familiar?

He stood up suddenly, startling me out of my thoughts and I had to crane my neck a bit too much just to look at the underside of his chin and throat. I willed myself to not look at his nostrils, else I burst into laughter.

"Anyways, kid, see ya again sometime." He said and went on his way, not once turning back. I expected him to turn back around and flash a funny face, before going back and holding a hand up in a lazy wave, putting extra effort to look cool until the very end. He did not. Slowly, the smile on my face slipped and the gravity of the situation finally dawned on me.

For the first time in almost two years, pain and hurt blossomed in my chest, as the memories of my former life came flooding in. Sadly, I enter the gates of the orphanage, heart heavy and cold, choosing not to look back either.

I went to sleep that night with unshed tears and that was the start of the dreams and glimpses of the future haunting my slumber.

I dreamt of a chidori, sparking erratically, a few inchest away from my chest, a raging tailed beast inside my being, and a brainwashed Uchiha watching his world burn away.

I woke up to Totsuka frantically shaking me awake, worry evident on her eyes. After asking me if I was alright, and getting a yes as an answer, she went on her way to wake the others. I operated on my body's autopilot, going to the library by sheer muscle memory and not even understand what the books I had gotten were trying to say. I left the library without a smile that day. I ate a few spoons of my dinner, before pushing it to Knee, who refused to let me sit alone. I still don't know his name.

I fell asleep fairly quickly, before I was engulfed by another sad dream.

I dreamt of Jiraiya dying by the hands of Nagato, the face of a crying Naruto, the denial and grief that overtook him, no matter how short and the guilt brought by the winning bet where both lost and the slow burn in Tsunade.

I woke up the next day, crying and struggling to breathe. Someone noticed and ran off to call a caretaker, if I were to guess but they were a few seconds too late. Darkness crept up my eyes and they rolled back, knocking me unconscious. I was, in yet again, another bad dream.

I dreamt of Kakashi and Obito, fighting hand to hand like the old times, their Sharingan flared to life, one of them with a fake arm, flashbacks of their childhood and their life before entering the darkness, where figures of both Minato and Rin, _me,_ watched on as they traded blows in the middle of the training ground before warping to where they were fighting for their life.

I woke up the next day slight afraid, if not terrified, of the future.

I saw Knee trip on a flower that lay harmless in the middle of the playground in the next hour, a caretaker rushing to look him over and I thought to myself, I can change that future. I planned for a few days after, battling the dreams of the future, and thought of a good plan and contingency plan for my new life.

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Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months where none of the Sannin came by to visit the Orphanage. It didn't matter, I said to myself, I have other things, other people to worry about. I was, again, nearing another year in this life. War was brewing slowly, but I could feel it in the people, feel it in the wind and feel it in myself. My determination to change how things went, slowly, little by little, waned. I pushed the bad thoughts away and focused on what I planned for the day.

Find a certain man named Maito Dai.

I woke up early (at about 5:30) and spent almost (or was it more than?) 30 minutes just lying on my bed, making my effort to wake up nonsense. I rushed to the bathrooms on our floor, (there was only five or four bathrooms per floor, and every floor had twenty to thirty occupants) to beat the shower rush. Focusing on my task for the day, I endured the freezing water, used clothes that were good enough to train in, and went to ask permission from Totsuka to go out on my own. She did not agree, but said she would if I let Knee come with me. I agreed, after all, I really needed to do this. She went to wake Knee up before quickly ushering us to the Dining Hall, where a few early birds were helping the other full time care takers set up the plates. We helped prepare the food and as reward, got an extra slice of apple each. I gave mine to Knee.

"Thanks, Rin! I really like apples." He said as we said our goodbyes to Totsuka who saw us off. I nodded in response, trying to focus on the current task at hand. He, Knee, continued chatting up a storm, before he tripped again and stayed silent the whole time we loitered around the park.

Now, you must be curious as to why I am searching for a person known as the "Eternal Genin". I wanted to train this body enough so it could at most, imitate Tsunade's strength. She might be famous for her extreme affinity with the medical arts, but her superior strength was not thanks to her very precise chakra control. She was, in all sense of the word, also very strong in terms of raw, physical strength, if you compare her to her two other teammates. Maito Dai and his son, Gai, together with Rock Lee, were the most prominent taijutsu specialists in the whole Naruto franchise, as even Madara Uchiha himself acknowledged Gai's strength in the taijutsu arts. I wanted to emulate Tsunade in my fighting style and I thought it would fit with my current abilities. I could already pretty much do (or what I thought I was doing,) the basic Mystical Healing Palm jutsu, on the minor scrapes and bruises some kids get, whether from playing or fighting. I, of course, before using it on people, experimented on the live fish the Orphanage get as donations. I was, pretty much, a professional now.

We said our goodbyes and started the long search of which route Gai's father used to train himself. We walked along the roads that many people with hitai-ates passed through and automatically thought it must be a very common route for ninjas to take to pass through the village and around the civilian populace. Knee was fidgeting beside me, irritating me as he kept on cracking his knuckles and by walking slightly behind me, not beside me. And that irked me a bit (a lot) as he used me as a shield to hide himself. I stopped walking and turned around to confront him about it, but instead of going off on him, my eyes locked onto a scene I would have stopped myself if I were only a little bigger and thus, taken more seriously. There, in all his surprisingly very nice shade of green and orange, Maito Dai held a mini-me of himself by the hand as he thanked a pair of chunin for walking up to him and asking about his day, and for even knowing him.

(On the inside, I was fuming, for what good did it do to the economy of the village? Did-I sputtered in my mind, as they walked off like nothing happened, did your bullying help you get promoted to jounin? What good did it do to you by calling him that very insulting nickname?) Immediately, I was dragging Knee by the back of his collar, even though he was a little taller than me, to where the still beaming genin stood. I notice, at the corner of my eye, that Gai was frowning, obviously sad with what he just witnessed.

"Hello, sir. Good morning." I say and bow a respectful 90 degrees, before pinching Knee to follow suit. He complied and bowed next me before we simultaneously straightened up. Maito Dai's laughter bellowed as he bent a little to look at us. Next to him, Gai was positively beaming, eyes sparkling like in the anime. He, Knee, cleared his throat and introduced us both, eliciting another bout of genuine laughter from Dai.

"Why do you both act like adults? Enjoy your youth!" He exclaimed, letting go of Gai's hand for a little bit to ruffle our hair, and immediately held his son's hand once again. "We need your help with something, sir." Knee gasped beside me, before choosing to gape at me. I stared at him like he was being ridiculous (which he was) and looked right back at the man clad in green. He raised one bushy brow and asked us what we needed from him.

"Please train us." He, along with Knee, stared and both jaws fell. Knee, obviously, was very, very unhappy with me right now, but, I think to myself, he would benefit from this too anyways. Dai, however, was positively shining in excitement, along with his son.

"Papa! We can train together!" Gai said, throwing a fist into the air, before doing his 'nice guy' pose. Knee sputtered behind me before wrapping a hand on my wrist in an attempt to escape the father-son duo.

"Are you out of your mind? We can't go hanging out with them!" He whisper-yelled at me when we were a few meters away. He pulled on his hair when I raised a brow at how he was acting. He murmured something that sounded like _going crazy_ and _weirdos_ before letting me drag him back to where the Maito men were standing.

"So when may we go train with you?" I ask, before I slowly realized what I had just done. I just asked to train with Gai (technicality, his father, but whatever), who was a hardcore training freak. Or would be training freak.

As Jiraiya would have done, I cursed. Out loud.

 **"Shit."**

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As one would have expected, Maito Dai reprimanded me for such crude language and made me do 30 push ups on the spot. Ever the training enthusiast, Gai joined in and Knee was forced to do so with little (lots, lots and lots of) encouragement from both Dai and Gai. It may or may not also be because of the threat of having to wear green body suits every time we train. I had no problem with that though, I don't know about Knee's clothing preferences. I just tend to go with anything as long as it was not 1) transparent, 2) no frills (I am still a male, no matter what they say.) and 3) no dresses. They (my legs and thighs) feel so cold when I am forced to wear one. God forbid that it gets windy, or I _will_ throw a fit. This world has never seen an 18 year old trapped in a 4 year old's body throw one. And they would wish they would never have to witness it.

Speaking of tantrums, Knee was being the absolute pissiest baby out there. He kept on huffing everytime Gai spoke and clearly, Dai had caught on. I sigh. Kids.

He decided we should come training with them every Wednesday to Sunday, and use the two remaining days in the week to recuperate and rest up. I decided I could hit two birds with one stone if I used the time my physical body was resting up to practice my chakra control by healing minor injuries, (and maybe learn how to do the chakra scalpel somewhere down the line) and to further improve and train my chakra coils and reserves so they could manage continuous amounts of flow. After all, I would be quite the useless medic if I could only heal two or three times in the middle of a fight. I agreed for both Knee and I.

I still don't know his name, and we've been training together for about 3 weeks and four days now. I was again, beginning to lose patience. Why can't he just introduce himself to me? Why do I have to ask for his name anyways, when he should have introduced himself when he thanked me. I crush the rock I have been trying to flip on my palm with an overdoes of chakra, before turning to face Knee who was still busy trying to stick a piece of leaf to his forehead.

"Rin," Someone called out and I turned around to look for the source, "-you'd have wrinkles between your brows if you don't stop glaring daggers at your friend." The Head Matron, Shiokaze-san, (her name was very pretty and it fit her well) stared at me with her sea-green eye and flowy brown hair. She had the top part rolled into a bun while the rest cascaded on her back and shoulders. She was very dainty, (as dainty as a retired jounin with a missing ear and eye could be) and very calming. I stared back at her and let go of the crushed rock on my palm.

"His fault." I say, simply choosing to stare at the ground than see her surely change her expression. I heard a laugh instead. A hand hit my head lightly, and I looked up to glare at her. She laughed again. "Your friend's name is Hanei. You've been grumbling about it for almost ten minutes now." She said before she turned around and started telling a kid a few meters away from us to stop plucking the flowers. I grumble to myself before around to look at Kne-Hanei. Hanei, huh? What a nice name, I thought to myself, before opting to continue calling him Knee.

"Thank you." He said, ears red as he looked at me. "Huh?" He puffed his cheeks and pouted, before explaining himself. "For saying my name is nice. You've been saying things out loud." I resisted a gasp and opted to just sigh instead. "Since when?"

"Since fifteen minutes ago." I couldn't resist a face palm and did so, before shaking my head. I am such a fool. That was so stupid of me.

"You're not! I think you're smart!" I think I heard Shiokaze-san's laughter from somewhere. I let it slide.

"Stop it. Let's go train again."

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It was _that_ time already. I was very nervous, even Hanei shared the same sentiments about what was about to go down. We were both infront of Shiokaze-san and Totsuka, along with the other caretakers, sat on the seats. Along with us who sat on the ground were a few of the other older orphans and Gai, who, I have no idea how or when he entered the orphanage's living room, or why he was even present. Moral support, I guess?

Shiokaze cleared her throat and stared each and every one of us down. The hair on the back of my neck stood up on their ends and I struggled not to shudder at the sheer intensity her single eye could express and show. Even Gai stopped chatting with Hanei when he caught her gaze.

"So you all want to become shinobi, huh?" She said, before silence engulfed us all.

She stood up and pat the imaginary dust off of her clothes, before leading all of us to the backyard. She bit her thumb and calmly did the summoning jutsu.

"Come out." Smoke erupted all over the place and it soon revealed two dog-sized scorpions with purple and yellow ribbons on each of their respective tails, along side them were smaller ones with blue, red, orange, green, and pink wrapped around their slightly smaller tails. Kids left and right ooh'd and aah'd over the 'cool summons' before most of them tuned out. She introduced us to her summons, explaining to us to scorpion summons all have ribbons on their tails, and any that didn't have, wasn't part of her contract. She turned around to face us and put her hands on her hips. Her eyes sharpened and I realized, no matter how old, no matter how many limbs are lost, no matter if he or she is retired, a jounin is a jounin, and they could all give serious killing intent out like it's no one's business.

I had a newfound respect to both Kakashi and Itachi, who were both promoted to such high ranks so fast. I grit my teeth and fail to cross my arms as one tail, (a purple ribbon tied around it tightly) came right at my chest and I felt someone pull on the back of my collar. It was Gai.

"Lesson one," Shiokaze started, before hitting Gai off of my back, leaving me exposed in both fronts. "Never space out in the middle of a battle." I felt a stinger slap my right cheek before I batted it away. By the time I was next to someone again, my cheek was a throbbing painfully and tinged bright red. Immediately, I tried to heal the throbbing away, before another stinger hit me square in the temple, dizzying me enough that I fell to the ground. A few kids were already crying and some were even knocked out.

"Lesson two," The jounin continued, parrying a strike from one of the older kid's, before pushing them harshly to the side, making them hit another kid, effectively putting them down. "Take down the ones who could heal themselves first." A fist came right at me before my body moved on it's own, fortifying my forearms with chakra. It was a feint, and a palm strike hit me directly at my lower back, throwing me both off guard and to where there was an awaiting tail ready to hit me.

I dodged, albeit just barely. Hanei was busy exchanging hits with Yellow, and infront of me was Pink. I took a step back before hitting someone, specifically one of the older kids. She was probably 6 or 7, based on her height and towered over both me and the scorpion. She was pretty battered, although not as battered as some were. "Team up with me, kid. We'll take Pink down and then help that kid with bushy brows take down Blue and Green." I nod, before shuffling so I was infront of her, protecting her chest and stomach from hits from our considerably smaller opponent, who you could expect to hit from the low sides. We were both wrong.

Pink disappeared and we both turned around to look for them. We didn't look down. She screamed in pain just as I heard something snap, my eyes widening as I saw her ankle bent at an incredible ninety degrees. I growled, before kneeling in front of her, who had collapsed into a crying heap. I did my best to numb the pain, before doin my best to restore as much use as I could to her broken ankle. I was halfway finish at a sloppy heal before I was once again batted away. I flew a few inches from before I got to my feet again.

"Lesson four," I frowned, where was Lesson three? "Know who your allies are." The gears in my brain rolled and there was a imaginary lightbulb that flashed above my head. I ran to where Hanei and a few others stood, passing by Gai who followed me. This was a test.

"Hanei! Gai! Protect us for a sec!" I said, receiving nods before I pull the others, _the last ones standing_ , to where I stood. They stood around me before I quickly explained the situation. They nod in agreement.

Shiokaze never said start, and that was lesson one. We may have spaced out, but she really didn't give any indication that the beatings would start. Lesson one was be aware, enemies wouldn't tell you when the fight starts.

Lesson two was a push to the standard "Medic at the back, fighters at the front" strategy that Tsunade had already demanded to be implemented. I saw Totsuka smile at the sidelines, before giving me a thumbs up. Ha, so I am right.

Lesson four was to make us know what each other could do. We didn't have cooperation and that was because we all thought everyone couldn't do anything. And now we're all battered.

What was lesson three?

I pushed the thought away before assembling the others to help the two at the front.

"I'm a medic, if you get hurt, withdraw from the front and come to me. You, you're long range? Keep close to me, all of you. Close range fighters help the two at the front." After finally getting a grip on ourselves, we finally had a tempo running. Those who got hurt withdrawed and came to me, while another takes their place. We were starting to get the hang of it.

Gai came a little while later, forearms bruised and lip split, and I immediately go to heal him. His forearms were purple and blue, and I inwardly cringed at how some parts were turning green. I murmured a low sorry to him and he nodded, thanking me with a nice guy pose before coming back to the frontline.

I felt the ground shake before all of the scorpions disappeared. Shiokaze stood tall and proud in front of our little circle, the ones at the front bracing themselves. She smiled.

"I'll allow all of you to go study in the Academy. You pass my test." She said, before turning around to lead us, battered and tired children inside the orphanage. I cried out as Hanei hit my lower back, which I still hadn't healed yet, and turned around to yell at him. My words died even before they could get out as I saw him, purple and blue in the arms and shins, no doubt even his torso is littered in ugly bruises. I realized he never went to get himself healed in the short time we got our asses kicked.

"We did it, Rin!" I smiled at his enthusiasm. He came a long way from being the shy, bullied kid to where he was now the frontlines between the both of us. He linked our arms and I complied, happy that he was happy.

"So what did you guys learn during your beat down?" Shiokaze asked after all of us got healed and settled down on the floor of the living room. Hands flew up into the air and she took her time to choose one.

She pointed at the one nearest her, which was one of the older ones, before leaning back on the couch.

"We learned that you shouldn't fight alone." She nodded before choosing another hand. This time, she chose Gai, who was waving his hand up in the air like a madman. "You, bushy brows, what did you learn?"

"We should utilise our youth as an advantage, like what Rin did!" He exclaimed before shooting Shiokaze a nice guy pose. She burst into belly-rolling laughter, before patting his head. "Sure, sure. Rin?"

"I learned that we should always be aware in a battle, where information is always given at the start, or even in the middle of it." She nodded and gestures for me to continue, I obliged. "We also learned how to form a unit, although a very sloppy one, to efficienctly and effectively utilise what odds we had against you and your summons. We told each other about what we could do and from that, formed a plan and successfully executed it." She nodded again, before opening her mouth to end our test. I beat her to though.

"What's lesson number three?" I asked, before pairs of eyes stared at me. "What do you mean?" Shiokaze asked, putting full attention to me. "You said lesson one, two and four during the fight. What is the third one?" One of the caregivers snickered, before I shot her a confused look. Did she really say the third lesson and I just spaced out and missed it?

"Oh, that's what you meant. Sorry, that was my bad. I was kinda making up things on the spot." The majority of us groaned while the caretakers laughed at us.

No matter, I thought to myself, now that I had the Head Matron's support, I can now start my mission to change the future.

A sharp sequence of knocking on the doors snapped me out of my reverie before almost forty pairs of eyes snapped to the large oak doors of the orphanage. Totsuka rushed to open it and it revealed Maito Dai. Gai ran over to him and immediately, they were chatting about what he just learned and what happened the whole time. Gai was going to be attending the Academy with us, along with Kakashi and a few more plot important characters. I had my work cut out for me.

I almost screamed in fright when Hanei put a hand on my shoulder, before steering me away from the father-son duo. They were still busy talking when we went out of hearing range.

"I need to tell you something, Rin." He said, ears red and fidgeting. I remembered the first time we met, and realized, it was our second year sticking by each other's side. It made my inside all warm and soft. I nod, gesturing for him to continue. He fidgeted some more, eventually calling the attention of Totsuka, who wandered over to us. She pulled us both to the small chairs that occupied the now empty living room, as most of the kids opted to go rest up while the caretakers cleaned the war zone outside. We sat quietly, before I notice Totsuka nodding encouragingly at Hanei.

I titled my head to the side, confused. His ears turned redder.

"Promise me you won't get mad." He said, finally speaking before I killed myself because of the tension. I cleared my throat and said "I promise," I started before glancing at the clock that hung above the fireplace. "—I won't get mad whatever it was that you need to say, unless you did something perverted." His whole face erupted into a bright red hue before he waved his hands, defending himself. Totsuka snickered. He grumbled under his breath and I lost my patience. I hit the top of his head and gave him a noogie, a constant sign of reassurance between us two. He sighed and melted into it before clearing his throat.

"I'm going to get adopted."

My smile could not get any bigger, and his tears started rolling down his cheeks. I congratulated him, confused as to why he was crying. This was great news! Why would I be mad at him? He's gonna get a family!

"Do you know who adopted you?" I asked, very happy for my best friend. He frowned, before shaking his head no. I asked why aloud, before I figured I could just ask Totsuka about his new family. She smiled at me before telling that the family who were going to adopt him wanted their identities to be a secret. I nudged him before wrapping my arms around his slightly bigger frame, saying encouraging things to him.

"It's good that you're going to get adopted! Why are you crying?" He sniffed before using his sleeve to wipe his snot, I grimaced. "I don't wanna leave Rin alone." He murmured before I felt tears falling onto my shoulder. I almost laughed, as it was so close to being a fictional story. Or a drama, maybe. "Dummy! We could still see each other! I could go visit you!" I say before hugging him again. Totsuka was quietly trying to escape the private moment Hanei and I shared, and I felt thankful for her consideration. I ought to make her a thank you card one of these days.

"Huh, you're right." He hiccuped in between his words before melting into the hug. I pat his back, playful but quite condescendingly. "Maa, maa. Crybabies don't get to be best friends with bad ass girls like me!" He choked on his laughter, pulling away before scolding me for using a bad word. If only he knew what other things I had said in my past life.

"And I have another thing to tell you." He said, now more relaxed than before. "I was given a summoning scroll by my new parents. I had signed it already." My eyes widened before I urged him to show me. He pulled me to his room, before pulling out the summoning scroll. A real, legitimate summoning scroll. It was the first time I had ever seen one, as even the Sannin never let me see their summons, even Jiraiya, no matter how boastful and obnoxious he was.

"Look, look." He bit his thumb, lightly drawing blood before doing the summoning. A small puff of smoke erupted in the middle of his shared room, (which no one was currently occupying, besides me, him, and his summon) before he turned to me, thumb all up on my face. I frowned playfully, rolling my eyes as I took his hand and healed it, purposefully leaving it half-healed so it would save me the chakra.

The smoke dispersed and out came ( _hopped_ ) a tiny, beige coloured bunny. A bunny with an ear piercing the size of a dot on one of it's little ears. "Hanei-san?" He said, pulling on one of his ears.

"This is one of my younger summons, Kyuri. Say hi." The summon obliged and waved at me with a tiny hand, before pulling on his ear again. Who names their child cucumber, I thought to myself as I watched the small summon demand to have his (or her) back scratched.

"Actually, I named her." Hanei said, scratching his summon's back gingerly. I sigh.

"Hanei-san is one of the first people to have a contract with the rabbits, you know. Because we only now allowed ourselves to be summoned, you know. So he's special, you know." Kyuri informed me, scratching at her ear with the piercing.

"And the piercing?"

"You only get one when you get summoned, you know."

We spent the next few hours talking with Kyuri, knowing about his summon's local rules and their history before Kyuri had to say goodbye because 'dinner time, you know.'. I looked outside the window of the room, where it was quite dark already.

"Let's sleep together, Rin." Hanei said, floofing up his two pillows, before scooting over to the far side of his single person bed.

I went with it, pleased that we were once again having a little sleep over.

I dreamt about an old and wrinkly Rin, brown hair no longer that pure cocoa color, but a few shades lighter now, a bird perched on top of her shoulder and a vast garden of hyacinths in front of her home.

I dreamt of what I wanted, of what I pictured my future to be.

I dreamt of myself.

And it was breathtaking.

I woke up the next day feeling happy despite Hanei's drying drool on my shoulder and the significant pain on my lower back, which I had completely forgotten to heal yesterday.

Looks like I have to take things more seriously now. Why? Because in just a few more weeks, I was going to be an official student of the Academy now.

The story was going to officially start, and I felt more determined than ever.


	4. 4 ted talk

Reply to: Cisk Kazzarch

* * *

it's a secret

Also, FFnet keeps messing up the format of this chapter; I can't seem to keep it in a proper format for more than a few minutes before it goes back to messing itself up. I want to die. Sorry if I'm a shitty writer.

On to the story~

Chapter 4

I felt something weird and soft slap over my forehead with so much force, the back of my head dug deeper unto where I lay, back-first. My eyes shit open before I came face to face with Hanei's summon, Kyuri, with her foot a few inches away from my forehead again in an effort to hit me. Gently, (or as gentle I could get a rabbit that just hit me in the forehead in what was supposed to be a wake up call) I pushed her off of me before standing up and stretching.

I rubbed my forehead, running my other hand through my really short hair to get the knots out of my fringe. I decided earlier on that although I hadn't messed up with the original plot by being a boy in a girl's body, I still wanted to pay homage to my old life and gender by cutting my hair really short in the back and keeping the front long enough that I could still be recognised as a girl. I put the top half of my fringe tied up in what Hanei called the apple hair, and leaving the bangs at the side of my face hanging. They weren't obscuring my vision anyways. Hanei was already putting his notebooks and pencils into his bag, a soft smile on his face.

"About time you woke up, Rin! You'd be late for the Academy." He said before patting Kyuri, who was demanding to be petted, on the head before turning around and petting my hair down. "Mou, we're going to different schools, Rin! I can't always wake you up on time!" He pouted, before shoving me out of his room. I grumbled under my breath, before pulling myself together and stretching on the hallway, where no one else was to be found. It was still quite dark outside, (which may or not be because of the huge ass trees that lines the outside of the orphanage) but if you listened very closely you would pick up the sounds of people and birds outside. Right, it would be my first day in the Academy.

"Are you sure you don't want to go to the civilian academy with me?" He asked, intent on changing my mind. I sighed and pulled on his hair playfully, before poking his forehead like what Itachi did to Sasuke. Heh, now I'm the owner of this poke. He swatted my hand away before pushing me to my room so I could get ready. Immediately, he was laying on my bed and playing with Kyuri. I rolled my eyes; opting to grab my towel to take a shower before going to school.

I pulled my clothes off, before standing in front of the full body mirror that I manually installed to the back of my bathroom door. I stared into my brownish-green eyes (I was baffled the first time, because Rin didn't have a green tint to her eyes and maybe my genes were mixing into hers) and I was pretty sure my case was sectoral heterochromia, where my eyes was divided into two colours. I had become quite the bully 'victim' by the time it became prominent and easily spotted, but fortunately, they still feared my kekkei genkai (or secret jutsu? I wasn't sure) seen only by people who bullied me, my dead eyed stare. It made people uncomfortable and I was perfectly happy with having weird eyes. Besides, the Uchiha and the Hyuuga has freakier eyes than me and they were famous for being attractive. I didn't see what the problem with my eyes were.

I stared into my reflection, before noticing a few things that weren't there before, or were originally not on Rin's face in the anime, but things I had on my first life. It seems that overnight, a few moles (or beauty marks, whatever you call them) popped up out of nowhere in my face, situating themselves in various places. One was on the middle of my bottom lip, where someone was bound to notice immediately. Another two were directly under my right eye, where the under eye bags where supposed to be. One appeared on the side of my button nose, just a little to the side of the tip. I sighed, before my eyes went lower. On my throat was another mole, this one less noticeable as it was only as big as a speck of dust. I checked my lower back, twisting my body so I could inspect if there were any other moles on me. There was one on the back of right knee and the rest of my body was clear. I had so many questions as to why that happened, and I didn't have anyone to answer then, so I just kept them to myself. My fringe was up to my eyes now, and the back was cut (as I had requested Shiokaze to cut it) as short as the boys, even shorter than some.

I pulled on the hair tie before taking the fastest shower of my whole two lives; the water was absolutely freezing. I quickly dried off, and wore the outfit that I had my eyes on for quite a while now. It was different from what Rin wore but people didn't know that. I laughed inwardly, feeling like a complete prankster.

Alright, it wasn't that different from what male shinobi wore in the anime, so it's not completely original; I'll admit that. Another that I do admit is that I didn't want any scratches on my new body though. I exchanged her short lower garments for the more safer clothes, a long black pair of loose high waisted pants, similar but not really to what Hinata wore. I kept the thigh part loose before wrapping the lower hem of the pants meant for the legs with bandage to keep them from fluttering about and tucking it into the standard shinobi sandals, the shin high ones. Kinda like how ANBU operatives style their pants. My white "tree" drawn shirt had been cropped, courtesy of Totsuka, when she noticed me keep pulling my shirt down every time it rode up my ribs. It fit perfectly with my pants. I didn't bother brushing my hair off, but did slipped a few hair ties on each of my wrists. After almost 20 minutes at most, I got out of the bathroom, only to find a note on my bed, neither hair or hide of Hanei present inside my room. I picked up the note, turning it over before snickering to myself. The note read as follows; in his 'unique' font.

You've been inside the bath for too long. Kyuri and I got hungry. I'm probably finished with both eating and brushing my teeth by the time you're reading this. Civilian school has an earlier start so I went ahead, since we're not even schoolmates. Don't forget to pack your lunch.

-Hanei

He at least put a note and a reminder, so I let it slip. I came down the stairs, only to find out that I was one of the late ones to come. "Ah, Rin! Come sit with us!" One of the older kids said, (I vaguely remember her as that girl I went to help during Shiokaze's test) and quietly I got food and sat next to them. They were all half way finished with their food but I wasn't in a hurry, so I kept a moderate pace, keeping track of their and the two tables next to ours' own conversations, silently looking over who would and might be my classmates.

Looks like I didn't have anyone to trust my back with, here. They had little to no care about what they had to go through before they become 'bad ass' ninjas. All they talked about were the fame and the fortune and not the lives they could save if they were stronger. Perhaps I wasn't one to judge, considering I had been born to quite the wealthy man, and thus, never wanted the finer things in life because I had been born with a silver spoon in my mouth and snot wiped with a silver tissue. Perhaps I didn't really understand how one would want a better life, when they would so obviously take the wrong path by dying before they even reach half of a fifty.

I quietly slipped away and went to the Academy by myself.

ㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡ

Due to us being orphans, (chosen as shinobi candidate among others by the Sannin themselves, and by passing Shiokaze's test, who was, albeit a retired jounin, still once was a member of Konoha's veterans, who by all means still had power and right to enter us into the Academy) I and a few other orphans got into the Academy without any entrance exams, contrary to what Gai and Kakashi experienced. To them, we were cannon fodder, insignificant children who had no value because we had no clan or esteemed shinobi to back us up except for Shiokaze Haru and a few medic school dropouts. People who no longer had any over the table connections, but I didn't hope for the jounin to pull any under the table strings to keep us safe. One person couldn't possibly save us all from our inevitable underaged deaths.

I shook my head to rid myself of the dark thoughts, before I spot two green clad males, the other perched upon the older's shoulders, making their way to the Announcement Bulletin. I slipped through legs upon legs of people trying to see and get to the front but finally made my way to the front. I scanned the list of names of those that had passed the entrance exam, and did not bat an eye when I spotted one Hatake Kakashi at the very top of the list of passing kids. I scanned the list more thoroughly and saw a few vaguely familiar names.

Gai wasn't there, as I had expected.

He got into the Academy as an alternative/special student, where they only focus on one specialty. I ran over to the duo, where Gai was sadly looking at his father. My heart broke and it hurt. I loved Gai, no homo. Or wait, was it still considered homo if I'm a guy in consciousness, but not in body? I'd guess not. He was that one sibling who made you do stupid things and supported you, while Hanei kept me alive by telling me what was stupid and what was dangerous.

They balanced each other out.

I have Gai a hug from the back as he wiped a few tears, before Dai started his speech about youth. I let go before I got dragged into their sunset genjutsu. A few meters away from us stood two gossiping and pointing chūnin who looked really familiar before something clicked inside my brain. They were the same ones that day when we first met Maito Dai. I let a growl rip from my mouth before I pulled myself away from the father and son duo, barely even noticed by them. I creeped toward the two chūnin before unleashing all of my five year old wrath.

I clawed one of them, and using chakra as enhancer, jumped on his shoulder and wrapped my legs around his neck, preventing him from breathing. The other shrieked in shock before trying to prying me away from his friend. I tightened my hold on his friend by pouring more chakra through my legs before twisting my upper body and pulling the other by the hair, intentionally ripping strands upon strands of his brown hair. A scream ripped out of my throat before I clawed at his face, making sure one or two or five of my fingers dig right into his face. I heard choking noises before I continued my chūnin beat down.

I was forcibly ripped off of the two idiots and two huge arms wrapped around my waist. "I'm not done yet, you bitches!" I screamed, kicking at the person holding me and successfully escaping. I launched myself at the one I choked before grabbing hold of his hair with one hand, the other being held back by someone, most likely his friend. I opened my mouth and chomped on the idiot's ear, mouth immediately filled with the tangy taste of blood. Oh well, that's extra human content.

I shrugged inside my mind as I got ripped away from the chūnin once again. Together with the force of the pull and the strength of my grip, I effectively ripped lots of hair from him, the bald spot at a very noticeable place. Someone was holding me in place and it spurred me on to do more damage.

"Rin! Snap out of it!" A familiar voice called out and I stopped resisting. I stared at the bloodied face of one of the chūnin, deep gashes, deeper than one would get from a cat, ran from his forehead down to his jaw. His hair was slowly falling, strand by stead and he clutched on his bleeding face. His friend was not in a good condition either. He was slumped next to someone's fence, catching his breath and a huge bruise starting to form on his neck.

His ear was missing and I just then remembered to spit out his ear, and I did, purposefully spitting it right at him. He had a bleeding scalp and when his gaze landed on me, I barred my teeth in an aggressive manner. He backed away. "Better sleep with one eye open, motherfucker." I growled as someone pulled me away from the two bloody men.

"Rin, watch your language." Another familiar voice rang in my ears and I spit one more time. "Sorry, Totsuka." I sweetly say, before continuing.

"Please sleep with one eye open tonight, motherfucker-san." I say before I heard Totsuka's quiet laughter. I turned around only to find that we, somehow in the span of almost 3 to 5 minutes, managed to get an audience.

There were whispers. Whispers everywhere. I was used to that. But what I wasn't used to is seeing Hanei so, so disappointed. I tilted my head to show my confusion before he moved so close, his mouth was touching my ear. "I thought we talked about biting people." He said before I laughed out loud, bloody teeth and all. He laughed with me, and that was all I could ever ask for then.

Maito Dai was not amused, whatsoever. Not even a bit. He gently pulled me away from my friend, before crouching down low so he could level his gaze with mine. "Why would you, a really nice girl, do that Rin? Why?" He said, disappointment shining through his eyes. I gulped, mouth opening and closing a few times in search of an answer before staying quiet as I looked at Totsuka quietly healing the chūnin to the best of her ability, (and by best of her ability, I meant doing the bare minimum so they don't get infected but still get nasty scars) and Hanei, together with Gai, herded the civilians away from the scene. I turn my gaze upon Dai once again, and I had the answer he wanted, now.

"Bullies should be left dead in a ditch." I say honestly, picking at my teeth that still tasted like blood. Dai visibly cringed before shooting me a warning look. "You'd be lucky if the Academy still accepts you. You'd be a miracle if they don't send you straight to TI." An unknown voice quipped before Dai has the chance to say anything. Growling, I turned around only to meet eyes with Hatake Sakumo, or more commonly known by both civilian and shinobi as the White Fang. My eyes narrowed before I realized Kakashi was nowhere to be seen around him. Then a memory hit me. This was when Gai and Kakashi were supposed to meet, where Kakashi defends Gai from two bully chūnin. I ruined something that could turn into a major issue. I sighed.

"Well, those chūnin better toughen up. It's not my fault a kid not even in the Academy could deal that much damage to them." I retorted as the Hatake crouched down in front of me, claiming the space next to Dai who was also still in the same position.

"That's true, but it doesn't mean you're still allowed to attack a fellow shinobi of Konoha." Dai chastised before shooting me another disappointed look; I shrugged it off. "You even threatened them to watch out in their sleep. If we were in Kiri, someone might have encouraged that behaviour but this village values her soldiers' Will of Fire and teamwork. What if you and those two chūnin get assigned the same mission?" Sakumo asked, before I realized I had a little girl persona to act out. I was supposed to act how Rin would have acted. But this time, I didn't want to follow my own rules. They were making fun of someone special to someone I consider special to me, they get their asses handed back to them, beaten and bloodied. Like those two chūnin.

"Rin," Dai started, "—do you understand what we're trying to make you see here? You're a very smart girl, I know you could figure it out." He said, before staring at me. "I know what I did was wrong," Sakumo forced himself to chuckle before murmuring very under his breath, "—very wrong, yes, biting an ear off is bad, I know," both males looked at me before I crushed their hope.

"—but they started it. They may not have done anything to me, but Gai gets hurt every time they do that, and that hurts me too." I said, feeling every bit like a child whining to one's parents. If this attitude was what I had and this confidence was a trait I had for Before, my famiglia would've been proud of me, and not tried to hide my connections to them and to the rest of the world. Scars may heal and not hurt themselves, but there is such thing as phantom pains. I was a huge hypocrite. How could I judge all those mourning people when I myself couldn't even move on? What's done was done and I felt like I was trying to compensate, albeit it was over the top, for the things I couldn't do before. In my first life, I couldn't protect people, and they had to be burdened by protecting a 12th grade repeater with a really weak heart, so weak that he gets out of breath just trying to climb the stairs, I couldn't even handle the recoil of a gun.

"Doesn't mean you can attack anybody." I almost tasted the disappointment and disapproval in the air. It washed all over me, all at once and I couldn't help but blame myself. I didn't have anyone else. I felt my shoulders drop slowly and I hung my head in shame. I was overcompensating, when in reality, I had nothing and no one to hold onto in the world Before, and they, meaning the Naruto cast, wouldn't know or care about it anyways. I was Nohara Rin now. I am Nohara Rin. They saw me as Rin and not—not some kid riding his father's tail coat. I saw the tears fall on the ground before I felt them rolling down my cheeks. Dai picked me up and used the sleeve of his green body suit to wipe my continuously falling tears, before I lost myself and just cried. I realized the situation I was in and I only realized now. I thought it was a blessing, but it was also a curse. I had nothing to use as proof that this is my second life and I had no one to share the burden with. I was losing my identity and I was scared. I was so confused, I was beginning to mix up two very different lives.

So I cried. I cried for my father, I cried for the famiglia, but most importantly, I cried for myself. The pressure and sadness got to me, and I didn't have any outlet for it. So I overcompensated, used two other people to be the victim of my frustration and vented it all out on them. I was unconsciously trying to get praise for what I also unconsciously thought this second life would entail.

Like a beast, I lost control. Worst, I lost to myself. I had been fighting and confusing and pressing myself too hard and for too long, it was a wonder I had not snapped any sooner. I cried, knowing I messed up. I cried knowing nothing I could ever do would ever change what I just did. I cried knowing that it was all my fault.

It always was.

It was my fault my father let me die, it was my fault I was weak. If only I tried. If only I had the strength. If only I had the confidence. The world was shaking.

It was my fault Gai probably hated me. Kakashi was probably traumatised now. Hanei was probably disgusted with me. Totsuka might have been laughing at me.

itsallyourfaultitsallyourfaultitsallyourfaultitsallyourfaultitsallyourfault

"Rin! Snap out of it!"

itsallyourfaultitsallyourfaultitsallyourfaultitsallyourfaultitsallyourfault

"Rin!"

itsAllyouRfaultitSallyOurfAultitsAllyoUrfaultItsaLlyourfAUltitsallYourfaulT

"Snap out of it! Breathe! Breathe!"

IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT

"Rin!"

I felt someone slap my forehead and cheeks, before cradling me to their chest. It was warm. It was warm and soft. Quite humid, but comfortable. I felt thrumming all over my body. It was being born all over again. It was a huge deja by moment. My eyes shot open before I closed them back again, as my eyes landed on Hanei and Gai who were standing so so far away, and they were out of my reach and even Totsuka didn't want me anymo—

"Rin!" I clutched the warm clothes and pushed my face onto it. I felt my body being transferred into someone else's arm and I felt disgusting, even my saviour didn't want me—

"Rin, it's Totsuka. Can you open your eyes for me?" I stayed still for a few seconds, processing what I just heard. Slowly, I opened my eyes and that's when I felt the strain on my chest. "Breathe." I gulped in as much air my little chest could inhale and I felt my eyes water at the unexpected comfort it brought me. I was hyperventilating. "That's right, breathe slowly for me now." I slowed down my breathing and I felt a warm, open palm press into the space between my shoulder blades, pushing a warm comforting thing into my back. "Good girl, Rin." I closed my eyes, relishing in the feeling of Totsuka's arms around me, and I felt my hand stop shaking. I felt my whole body slowly stop shaking.

I felt stares on me, and it made me feel vulnerable. In my first life, people always whispered around me. I would know, everybody did so. My eyes snapped open; my breathing picking up. But they never outright stared while they whispered. They never made a spectacle of me. I saw red again.

I made a move to do it all over again when I was suddenly falling, and all I saw was black.

ㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡ

Rin lay unmoving on the ground, breathing a stable tempo. Totsuka stared wide eyed at the infamous Hatake Sakumo, shocked that a man known as a compassionate person hit a child, even though it was to just knock her unconscious. He picked her off of the ground with ease and turned to Totsuka, frown settling into his face. "As a shinobi of Konoha, of the rank Jounin, I have the right to demand to talk with her parents to see and check on her mental state. You, miss, obviously know her enough to speak on a first name basis, and I will assume you know her parents or guardians personally. Bring me to them." He demanded as he sent his own son home alone, if not for Hanei and Gai offering to come with him, which he surprisingly accepted. The kid was a stuck up brat.

She nodded dumbly, mute by her own accord. She didn't have the guts to be sassy or to be rude to one Hatake Sakumo, for she feared he'd cut her down, strike her for even speaking to him or worse, hurt Rin who was still in his arms. Silently, they went to the Orphanage building, together with the man who was famous for all the wrong reasons, Maito Gai. She had seen him around many times, and he even did a few volunteer work to fix a few parts of the orphanage during the age when he was still young and it was still acceptable to be a genin. Totsuka was still but a mere child herself, back then. She pitied him whenever she saw chūnin or jounin picking on him, but never came to his rescue for fear of getting hurt.

She only allowed Rin to hurt those men because she didn't have both the heart and confidence to beat down two bullies. It was also the cause of her downfall. She snapped out of her thoughts when they arrived at the gate of the orphanage, and she silently signed to the civilian guard to help her open the gates. Once they were all inside the property, she led them to the private lounge for the important people that visited once or twice a month, thrice if the Orphanage was stuck between discontinuing the the service or risk starving/overworking/selling/renting themselves to feed the children.

Totsuka's guests sat on the slightly dusty couch as she hurried to call Shiokaze. In her hurry, she fell twice and scraped both her knees in such a fashion that looked like it hurt really but it was just that it made it very bloody. She picked herself up and pushed herself to barge into Shiokaze's room, where she spread paperwork onto her bedroom floor (the Orphanage did not have the luxury of an office, so they had to make do with what the building had) and immediately uttered "Hatake." before her superior was gone in a blink of the eye.

She felt her knees buckle under her own weight, before she felt the shivers and tears wrack her body. She put a hand over her mouth before a sob broke out and ran her chakra over her bloodied knees. This was why she couldn't graduate to become a medic. She was too scared to get hurt and even more scared of confrontation. She hit her own throat in an effort to stop the sobbing; to forcefully make her swallow the fear.

She heard the stern voice of Shiokaze flat out denying that Rin was mentally unstable, not when the kid showed so much talent and was a terrifying prodigy in the ninja arts. Hatake Sakumo retorted that if she was so sure they'd let one of the doctors in the hospital to check up on the child, just to be really sure that she was okay mentally. Shiokaze was bristling in barely contained annoyance, knowing that the kid she personally watched over was not one bit a psycho.

"Do you even know what she did? She bit someone's ear off! Clawed a chūnin's face then ripped their hair straight off their scalps. She attacked without warning, and considering that's an act against the Village, I, as a jounin, have the right to investigate the matter." Sakumo said all in one breathing, refusing to back down from his senpai. "You'd regret not trusting me on this, Hatake. I didn't lose an eye and a limb trying to save two of your squad members only to be repaid with this kind treatment and of lack of trust in my ability to see through a person." She growled, before turning around and telling him to handle all the expenses, making him sigh in relief and for Dai, who was surprisingly quiet, put a hand on his shoulder and offered to shoulder some of the expenses, before the man refused; it was his idea to get the child checked over, anyways.

Shakily, she scrambled to run after the two shinobi who, without any one to restrain them, went to the hospital full speed. By the time Totsuka reached the hospital there were no sign of the two men and her knees and lungs were about to collapse on her. She ran up to the info desk and knocked on the wood to get the person's attention.

Black eyes turned towards her and she gulped audibly before meekly saying "Nohara Rin. Was with Hatake Sakumo." The person over the desk arched a brow before telling her to go to the third floor, room number 027 before they went back to whatever they were doing. Without saying her thanks, she sprinted up to the third floor, using her well polished evasion skills, (it helped when kids starts fighting and start throwing whatever they get their grubby hands on) and dodged every person in order to get to the room as fast as she can. She reached the room labelled 027 and heard screaming and things being knocked over violently inside. She opened the door only to see Rin thrashing violently against the hold of Sakumo, a Yamanaka trying his best to inject Rin with a sedative. To no avail, of course, as the little spitfire kicked and screamed and threw anything she wrapped her fingers around. Dai was nowhere to be found though, she thought, as she looked around frantically for the green clad man.

"Totsuka! Help me!" Rin screamed as the Yamanaka got a hold of her head and made a move to bite his fingers off. She rushed to the five year old, snatching her from Sakumo's hold and cradling the sobbing child against her chest. She did her best to stop the crying but the little girl just wouldn't stop. Shakily, stood up on her wobbly feet and did her best attempt of a glare at the dangerous shinobi infront of her.

"As N-Nohara Rin's default guardian, I-I can get you arrested for child abuse." She said as she backed out of the still open door before she turned tail and ran with the child still in her arms.

Once she reached the outside of the hospital, she looked down and swore.

Maybe they really ought to get Rin's mental health checked. The slightly deranged look in the child's eyes that bore into her own made chills run down her back, and fear to creep on her heart.

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Rin woke up to a Yamanaka about to put their hand on her head. She screamed. They couldn't just roam around her head! She thrashed against arms that held her and tried to bite when the Yamanaka got too close. The door opened to reveal Totsuka, panting as if she just ran a marathon. She screamed for help.

They can't see her past and their futures.

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In the end, word of a child, not even an academy student take two veteran chuunin down, all by herself got out and spread all through out Konoha, and obviously, the Hokage had learned of this predicament. The child was not tested for mental instabilities but apparently one war veteran, (a jounin, retired from the Second Hokage's personally assembled ANBU force) looked over the young lass, and saw nothing different about her, except maybe for her being a prodigy in the ninja arts and being slightly more mature than her peers. So he did the most plausible and obvious thing to do. He ordered the child to be brought to his office so he could talk to her, one on one. He was surprised to see a midget- a little girl not even tall enough to reach his hip (he was quite the small person) enter his office only to bow curtly and introduce herself before even the Hokage tried to make her.

"I am Nohara Rin, five years old. I'm from the Orphanage currently run by Shiokaze Haru." She said before bowing again. It surprised, Hiruzen, it really did, because even the most bravest nin under his jurisdiction had the gall to speak before he did. He almost sputtered as she sat on the chair right in front of his table without him even prompting her to do so. He became even more surprised to see that the confidence was not a bravado. She really was confident. He took a hit on his pipe and watched how her features scrunched into annoyance and disgust, and soon turned to become quite the judgmental look (that was high praise coming from Hiruzen, since he has quite the fair share of people who he knew had a look that topped hers, cough Danzo cough) when he blew it all upward.

"So how are you?"

"Pretty mango." (1)

"What were you doing before you went here?"

"Stuff."

"What kind of stuff? Playing ninja, helping out in the orphanage or training?"

"Things."

"What kind of things?"

"What? Did you say something?" (2) He stopped himself from sighing.

"I reckon you know why I had you called in here?" The Hokage asked, scrutinizing the little human who sat in front of him with such confidence. He leaned forward so he could study the child's features a little bit better. She had brown hair, which was cut like as short as one would their son, eyes that had green and brown fighting for space, cleanly cut in the middle, making it clear that the child had heterochromia. She had a two moles directly under one of her eyes, a mole on the side of the tip of her nose, and a mole on her bottom lip. She wore earring the same style as the Nara clan had. She wore a black top and a jacket far too big for her, it practically swallowed the child. She had black standard pants and bandaged shins tucked into her sandals. She didn't flinch when they met gazes and it made Hiruzen's stomach churn slightly as he saw the glint of what looked like a piercing at the side of the child's neck. She shook her head at the question before Hiruzen tore his gaze away from her neck. Who would let a five year old child get a neck piercing? He suppressed a shudder as he schooled his features.

"Alright. Can you tell me what happened during the altercation? Why you did it?" Patience, he reminded himself, even if you're looking at a person that took down two chuunin using bloody means, that someone is still a child. "They were badmouthing my taijutsu trainer. That same man is the father of one of my friends." She said, voice level and calm, as if she's just talking about gardening. "Also, they should have seen it coming. I was screaming when I attacked them." She said, almost as an afterthought, before shrugging and slightly slouching. Hiruzen sighed, he knew he was starting to get a migraine. He was too old for this. "Can you tell me what happened during your confrontation with the chunin? I'm afraid I don't really have a credible source of what truly happened there." He said, before pulling up his 'professor' mask, so the child would think twice about lying to him.

She wasn't scared. She didn't lie nor did she exaggerate as most children are wont to do. Hiruzen was sure of it. She kept eye to eye contact during the whole time she told him what happened, even putting a few morbid jokes about 'extra carbohydrates' when she got to the part where she bit off someone's ear. One thing he also noticed was, she didn't seem to be scared of repercussions, (not that there was, for goodness' sake, she attacked chunin, not a pair of genin, they should've have been able to fight her off or defend themselves.) and strangely, she almost looked relaxed. _Relaxed_. The only person he ever knew that relaxed when talking to him as a Hokage was his wife and a few exceptions, like the Sannin, as they were his students. Even ANBU and his former teammates were never relaxed around him, even Danzo, no matter how stand-offish he tried to act around the man. No one was truly relaxed, as if talking to a person of equal footing. It made him tense up. It was rather, dare he say, refreshing, as he listened intently to the five year old's story. "And thus, they should have never talked bad about Maito Gai. Thanks for coming to my ted talk." She finished as the Hokage stared at her. What the hell was a ted talk? And was she insinuating that he was the one that adjusted for her?

"As much as I want to know what ted talk means, I appreciate you being protective of family-why are you raising your hand?"

"Ted talk means an inspiratio- you know what? Never mind." She said, slouching even more and puffing her cheeks out. The Hokage pointedly looked at her like she was being weird (which she was), and instead, opted to ignore her show of slight crazy. He cleared his throat before asking if she thought what she did was right. She looked at him incredulously, and if this wasn't such a serious time he would have had laughed at such a look from a little girl. She pulled herself together and gave him a very straight to the point answer, "Yes. They were bad guys anyways, going as far as to even go bullying someone that they knew wouldn't retaliate." before clenching and unclenching her hands that were laying limp on her lap.

His eyebrows rose, and she raised one of her own. "You have quite the opinionated moral compass." He said, clearly challenging her to correct him. She did.

"I don't. I'm just being a decent human being." She retorted, crossing her legs.

"And how do you know how to be one? You're not even a decade old, yet you preach about being one." He challenged once again, intrigued with how sharp the child was, where little by little he was finally starting to realize why such a famous jounin such as Shiokaze Haru would call her a prodigy. A genius among cannon fodder.

"So you would say, but remember, if dealt the right cards, even a crow could beat a hawk." She said, a dangerous glint in her eyes, and it took all of his self-control not to snarl at her, his basic instincts telling him to tie the girl and interrogate her, for her smile showed knowledge of something he didn't know. He didn't act upon that train of thought though, as she wiped her face of any signs of a dangerous person and schooled her features to be of a little girl, unsure of the world.

"But what do I know right? I'm only a measly five year old with no experience whatsoever." She said as she shrugged in what was an attempt to be cutesy, completely negating what she just said mere seconds ago. Then he realized, this little girl had been playing with him since the moment she stepped foot in his office, no matter how subtle it was. It made him bristle with slight annoyance. How dare this little girl play him like that? She smiled at him, mismatched eyes glinting playfully, knowing full well he realized she was messing with him. Complete insubordination. This was going on her records.

"Do not test me, little girl." He said, massaging his temples once again.

"That's what he said." (2) She said to no one in particular before Hiruzen barely stopped himself from sputtering. How indecent!

"You shouldn't be saying that."

"So that was what I forgot to tell those chunin! Thanks." (3)

"I'm afraid we will have to talk at a later date, Rin." He said, shooing the little girl out of his office. She gladly did so, even going as far as intentionally skipping out, loudly saying "Phew, it smelled like old man and boredom in there!" outside where one ANBU was stationed, before he heard "How do you deal with having to watch an old man with smoking problems all day, Mole-san?" and a choking laugh that followed soon after. The laugh was very familiar, and it made Hiruzen want to slam his head on his table. Jiraiya was here.

Just his luck.

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(1) Pretty mango= pretty peachy. You know, both are fruits?

(2) That's what he said= you already know, don't you? ;)

(3) So that was what I forgot to tell those chunin! = i know you get this

So that was that, I just wanted to show how fragile a person's mind is, if it is under constant pressure. Sometimes, snapping goes little by little. Also, ignore the last 27 or so words, I just wanted to get this chapter over seven thousand words. Also also, a wild Hatake Sakumo and his floof of a son, Kakashi have appeared! What will happen now?


	5. 5 family

Chapter Five

Jiraiya was here. Just the Hokage's luck. She snickered as she passed by the huge man, recognition flashing through his eyes. He stopped just infront of the ANBU stationed outside before he turned towards the little spitfire he hadn't had the chance to see in months.

"How are you, Rin-chan?" He asked the little girl who seemed to not grow any more than a few inches in months. She smiled, showcasing her teeth (which somehow had a red undertone to it, no matter how white it looked) before she bounded up to him and slapping his thigh. He howled in pain, eyes bulging out of their sockets as she smiled up at him and chirped an "I'm fine, Jiraiya-oji! How are you?" He grumbled under his breath before rubbing his thigh that was throbbing painfully. Who knew such a small girl could hit that hard?

"Great, gre—" He was cut off as the Hokage shouted for him to come inside the office already, before he shook his head and pat the kid's head. "You heard the old man, Rin-chan. If you're wondering, Tsunade went to the Hospital to help and Orochimaru is, well, good luck finding him." He said, waving the little girl off as he entered the room, smile slowly dropping off of his face.

He had more serious matters to attend to.

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He shivered as he washed his hands again. Serpentine eyes stared back at him as he traced the pale face the mirror showed him. His hair was up in an intricate up do, held by a white stick. His white and purple yukata matched his appearance beautifully, as the dark purples and the fit of his clothes complemented and contrasted against him. He was in his small house at the very edge of the village, covered by thick canopies of the Hashirama trees and boulders, the moss-covered outside of his sunken house just a little shy of 12 meters underground, the perfect camouflage in this green infested area. He winced as he ran a finger on the mirror, tracing his eyes. He couldn't take the stares. He couldn't take the whispers. No matter how much he wanted them to accept him, they just wouldn't give him a chance.

He combed through his long dark hair, untangling the knots that somehow existed in his hair. He looked at his reflection in the mirror. Wasn't white the colour of purity? His skin was white. Why didn't the people like him then? They avoided his path and gaze like he were a leper, why did they do that? Don't people want to befriend men and women who had power? He was powerful, and that was being humble. Don't people, civilian or not, want to have connections with people who have money? He wore a lot of expensive yukatas and hair pieces, why did they not want to talk to him? He had a lot of money, cash or credit in their banks, you name it. He had land. So what was so different and disgusting about him that people avoid even being in his presence?

It wasn't fair.

They weren't fair.

What was so different about him? People liked Jiraiya, and that man was an open, extreme pervert. He always had the gall to peek on the onsens. Didn't people dislike perverts? Of course they liked him, he taught Namikaze Minato. People liked Tsunade, who beat people up if they so much as gaze at her torso. Don't people not like abusive people? Of course, people liked her, she was the granddaughter of the Shodaime. She helped at the hospital. She was a medic.

"What's so different about me?" He asked out loud, thoughts running miles per second. He healed people too, didn't he? He helped in the hospital too, even voluntarily helping out in the morgue where people did not want to work.

Orochimaru of the Sannin was just a nobody, screamed his brain before his golden eyes sharpened into slits.

He was a shinobi of Konoha, a loyal child of the Motherland. He fought tooth and nail for Konoha, and his place in her heart. But why do the people avoid him like he experimented on children? He was one of the few people who donated to the orphanage regularly, and had probably donated more than their annual stipend. He did so much for Konoha but why won't she accept him as he is? Is he doing something wrong? Was he wrong? He didn't want to change because he is who he is now. He is Orochimaru, a child of Konoha. Not Orochimaru of the Sannin, not the Snake Sannin, not one of Konoha's Shinobi. He was and is Orochimaru, Konoha's son, not by blood, not by force, but by will. He was willing to kill and bleed for her, is he not? So what was so different about him that people don't want to approach and know him?

Suihebi, one of his albino constrictors, slithered over to him and wordlessly wrapped around his ankle, slithering her way to her contractor's arm. "Are you still thinking about that? We're still by your side, even the Lizards support you." He sighed and ran a finger ontop of the constrictor's head, feeling the smooth skin of his companion. "Don't mind them." He smiled, shaking his head a little, before turning away from his mirror. "Let us go." His friend suddenly said, startling Orochimaru from his thoughts.

"Where to?"

"The little girl." Ah, Nohara Rin. "Why would we go to her? I can't seem to remember introducing you to her." He said, racking his brain for the supposed meeting between his ex-ward and his snake. "You didn't. I know you already heard her current issue." He thought about what the little girl could do, before the Snake Sanniin remembered some middle aged women near the gates gossiping about 'a little girl bit off an ear and almost killed two men!', but in his mind, there was no way Rin did that. The last time he saw her was years ago, and he was sure that the little girl would be under-aged and too small for the Academy. Unless she found a new hobby and she went around hurting people. He silently nodded his head to agree when he heard a frantic series of knocking on his door. He tensed up. No one knew where this house was, and this was about a few miles into the dangerous forest. Immediately, Suihebi was hissing and slithering towards the ground, just a little behind her master, before he slowly opened the door. A head of short, brown, apple-styled hair popped through the gap so quickly Orochimaru didn't have the speed to push the door back in it's place. He stuck a kunai just a hair away from the smiling eyes that greeted him cheerfully as his own widened in shock.

"Hi, Oro-ossan! I'm sorry, I'm disturbing you but I got lost in the way of life and I really don't want to go do it on the ground and I really need to pee!" The little girl said as she slipped through the door and went on the opposite direction of where the bathroom is. "Toilet is the other way, Nohara." He called out as he gained his bearings, schooling his features into a blank state. How could she have tracked down this house? Not only was it extremely far from the center of the village, but it was hidden with layers upon layers of High-level Genjutsu, camouflaged to fit the surroundings, is almost a few feet underground and hundreds of traps only people on his level could avoid or just run through. She ran past him as she shuddered, slamming the door as she entered the toilet room. Suihebi hissed in surprise as he picked her up from the ground before dumping her on the couch. He paced around as he thought of how the little girl got past his defenses.

It was impossible. Even Jiraiya, who was considerably good in tracking and have been his teammate for years longer than the child's whole life, has never caught sight of him unless he wanted to be seen. Tsunade, for all her mastery over medical things and sensitivity to internal chakra, still couldn't track him down, even in their wildest dreams. "Orochimaru-sama?" The snake hissed as the door to the toilet room opened and out came a little girl who she was unfamiliar with.

"I focused on taijutsu!" The little girl said as she bounded up to the Snake Sannin, Suihebi hissing behind him. His eyes widened minutely, as a certain memory became a little more prominent than the others. She couldn't have remembered, can't she? She was too young back then.

She couldn't have understood, much less remember what he said. "Really? What made you want to focus on taijutsu?" He asked as she sat down on the plain couch, drawing her feet up into a lotus position as she snatched Suihebi from the side and promptly began stroking the large constrictor. The child was too forceful for her own good.

"You said I had to be a taijutsu specialist, so I focused on that. I plan on being the second medic-nin to ever be allowed in the frontlines to fight." She said as Suihebi struggled to escape, hissing at the little girl with as much bravado as she could. He couldn't help but melt as the child opened up to him, his eyes turning a little too glossy for his taste. He was, and is, discriminated and feared, but this little girl was giving him the basic respect and the openness he longed for. So he sat beside the girl and listened as she rambled on and on about her friend, Hanei, her taijutsu teacher, (he may have seen Maito Dai before, once or twice) and wanting to rip someone's face off. He blinked at that, as she told him the story of how she bit an ear and tore hair off of two chuunin, in a fit of rage because they 'talked shit' as she put it, and 'I won't allow that on my watch!' as she moved and reenacted how she took the two men down.

It reminded him of one of the more advanced Hebi style taijutsu, constrict-hit hard-hit fast-takedown. It lacked finesse but that was one of the more effective styles for the bigger users and stronger fighters. It was not even good for a two on one fight. How she pulled that off was surprising, considering her weight and height. He studied how she moved and saw how her muscles tensed under her clothes, how she was a perfect candidate to teach his way of fighting.

"Would you like to learn a better tai-style? You seem to always use constriction and painful hits." He said as he pulled Suihebi away from the little girl. She smiled, heterochromatic eyes glinting with mischief as she enthusiastically nodded. He stood up and lead her deeper inside his house, tensing when a small warm hand wrapped around his cold, pale ones. He flinched and almost pulled away from her because of his instinct. It made his heart melt and stomach churn as he carefully squeezed it, not expecting her to return it. She must have only held onto him as she didn't want to get lost. She squeezed back twice as she skipped next to him. He held back a smile and relaxed.

"We shall study the basic stances first." He said, tying his loose hair once again. He spread his feet apart but not to shoulder width, just spread to the point where he looked like he was just standing. He put his arms a few inches infront of the same level his collarbones would have been aligned and kept his fists relaxed. She didn't follow his stance as she stared, eyes discerning everything and she dropped to her own stance. Her feet spread and leveled her center of gravity before her arms went up and her elbows stuck close to her torso. Her fists were also relaxed, just like his. So she wanted to spar first, huh? Well, who was he to decline that?

She made the first move. She was in front of him in the blink of an eye, for a _civilian_. For the Sannin, it was quite an impressive feat, given her age and supposed lack of formal training, but it was still slow. One hand reached out and in an instant she was on the close range defensive. She tilted slighty to the right, knees bending and feet spreading, dropping her body down as her left arm inched closer to protect her left side. She rushed as he gave her a blatant opening and a small hand shot out to punch him. He almost let himself get hit before he, fortunately, changed his mind and her fist struck the ground instead, making a few large cracks appear on his floor. One of his perfectly shaved eyebrows rose as he grabbed her wrist and twisted, a sickening crack ringing in his ears. He expected the little girl to surrender, before she jumped at him and wrapped her now broken arm around his and pulling him over her shoulder, putting as much strength as she can to flip him. He stuck to the floor with chakra before he felt himself unglue and get flipped over, and he smiled as he twisted his body in the air, twisting his arm free of her grasp and instead, grabbed her broken wrist and threw her to the ground. She cried out as she curled up on the floor, hands cluthing her lower back, moaning in pain.

"Let me heal you." He offered but stopped himself as her hands glowed a light green, and she slowly straightened out on the floor. Her wrist glowed as she ran her chakra through it first before directing it to her back, and he couldn't help but frown as he spot the various black and blue bruises on her arm that he couldn't see earlier. Her upper arms were littered in nasty bruises and her lower back was a big, purple splotch that contrasted against her pale skin. Was she being abused? Was she not being treated fairly in the orphanage? Was she getting bullied? All these questions ran through his mind before she pulled herself together and sat on the floor, short brown hair ruffled as she scratched her nape. Was that a piercing on her neck? He grabbed her by the nape and twisted her a little so he could see the silver piercing. It twinkled as light hit it's surface and he resisted the urge to grimace. Her green and brown eyes stared at him in confusion before understanding flooded them, and she pulled it out. His eyes widened as he saw the piercing become the rounded, blunt head of a single senbon, before he focused on the small, barely readable 'storage' writtien in a small circle on her neck. She smiled reassuringly as she stabbed herself with the senbon, (or atleast how it looked like to him) and pat herself free of the dust.

"It's for emergency, lockpicking purposes, sorry." She said as she reached for his hand and he instinctively flinched before he relaxed his hand as she held onto his own wrist. It slid down to his hand in a comforting manner, and held his in a gentle grip. "Let go of my hand," he said, slightly disappointed as she obeyed him, "-we must train you how to fight. Now, do your best to copy this stance." And copy she did.

She followed everything he showed her perfectly that even he forgot the time. She pulled and pushed her weight throughout her body and her natural flexibility were a great match, considering what she had done to his floor. She smiled and laughed as he told her she would have to go home, lest she be found out that she 'hangs out' with him. She said it wasn't like he was a pedophile or something, mumbling something that sounded strangely close to 'Danzo' and 'cursed hickeys' before beaming up at him, an imaginary light bulb lighting up in her idea.

"I'll go visit you here again!" She said, bouncing on her toes, making her hair bob up and down too. He fought the growing concern he had for the child, for people are judgemental. He knew people were already gossiping about her, what more if they were both seen together, social outcast with another outcast? That screamed disaster, and as much as the chance to teach her better tai-styles sounded, she had told him earlier that she just enrolled in the Academy, therefore, her using his style of fighting would be in vain, considering they grade the children by the basic stances, and not the advanced ones, even in simple sparring.

He shook his head in a firm no, where he would just cut their unexpected training, unless he be gossiped to be a pedophile. It would not do his already hurt image any good if he was ever seen with a little girl. Jiraiya, maybe, would suffer from a little dent since he was so well loved, but he just couldn't afford that. If it came to wanting to be accepted and wanting to teach her, the former far outweighed the latter, and he reassured himself that he was doing the right thing for both himself and Nohara Rin.

Suihebi watched on as the little girl smiled at her master, and she couldn't help but think she was a good companion to him. Not in a romantic sense, but one platonic relationship. She still couldn't understand how stupid some of the people Orochimaru chose to protect were, and she'd rather see her master protect people that would also protect him. She didn't like how the village treated him and she most definitely didn't like how they weren't even thankful for his efforts. It was stupid, not to say rude, when people gossiped and stared instead of thanking Orochimaru for fighting for them, for risking his only life on the battlefield for then, for protecting the village that treated him with less respect than one would do to someone that saved them dozens upon dozens of time. She continued to watch as the little girl healed herself and impressed her master, babbling on about her 'knee getting stuck to a shelf' and 'middle of the library' and whatnot, once again reenacting what happened then.

"But why?" She protested as she held onto his sleeve, and bouncing on her toes. Her master sighed and explained how people would judge her if they see her hanging out with him and some people would do anything to get under his skin. She seem to understand what he was saying as she sadly nodded her head in understanding, lips pursed in a tight line.

They walked her outside the house and quickly, before Orochimaru even had the chance to offer her a ride back home, the little girl high tailed her way away from the pair after she yelled out her goodbyes. She visibly pushed chakra to her legs and they almost glowed a soft hue as she quickly disappeared from their line of sight. Suihebi was about to say something before she notice the soft smile on her master's face. Ah yes, she would be a good companion to her master.

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She smiled as she ran through the forest, mission going extremely well in her point of view. The mission was to track him down and start befriending him, (as she'd rather the man was an ally instead of one whole pain in the neck running amok) as expected of a Sannin and future ex-member of the Akatsuki, he was hard to track down. The paths and perimeters that surrounded the house were littered with hundreds of traps and layer after layer of genjutu. It made her scared that she somehow run into village intruders considering there was war looming ahead, but the thought quickly vanished by itself when she coated her brain thoroughly with a thick film of chakra that repelled the genjutsu. It was good that she learned how to control her chakra inside her body or she would've have been dead by the time she took her second step into the general direction of the house. She got hit a few (read: multiple) times square in the body but managed to evade the others and get only a few shallow grazes on her arms and legs. She only got lucky as the house she knocked on was his, the moment completely unplanned and she was genuinely close to peeing her pants and really didn't want to do it on the forest floor.

The moment she felt the familiar chakra texture behind the door, she popped her head in and greeted the surprised man in front of her. She then technically trespassed his property even more as she entered the house without permission and quickly went to where she thought the toilet was located. Orochimaru has kindly told her that it was on the other way.

They talked and she opened up to the man, visibly seeing how her presence got him to relax and truly smile, unlike the ones he had sported during Naruto and Naruto Shippuden. Those were vile, and were smiles that were only used by people who only truly given up on their perspective of themselves and their image. So she talked, and gave him the kind of respect that one would need if they were starting to give up on themselves. She listened and strained her ears as he replied to her and treated her not like a child, but a person whom he could talk freely to. She held onto him as he doubted himself and told herself, that on a scale of 0 to a hundred, and his self doubt was on the ninety-nines, if she could give him hope and make that number drop down to ninety-eight or ninety-seven, then maybe, just maybe, she can help him move forward and save him, that her decision to help him was right and help herself learn from where he fell short and where he failed.

They would both be saving each other from themselves, she realized, she could literally be a treasure trove of information about this world and its debatably dark and bloody future, but her knowledge was nowhere near his. She could avoid rookie mistakes and have his guidance, and she would do her best to clear his name and help him with his future troubles, mainly regarding him not getting the fashion disaster that many wanted to get, the Hokage hat. She pooled chakra in her stomach and pushed them to her legs, pushing her to run faster as she raced to get back to the orphanage against time to be able to still eat dinner. It was dark and stars were slowly appearing on the cloudless night sky, and she took the time to admire the unpolluted atmosphere, breathing in the air as she slowed to a jog and took in the beautiful heavens that fell upon Konoha. Leaves rustled as the wind blew on the vast forest, Rin stopping as the breathtaking view of the open sky and its jewels shone bright, it was the best she had seen in both lifetimes.

A twig snapped and she whipped her head around and saw Maito Dai, his son nowhere to be seen. He gave her a forced smile as she visibly tensed up in his presence. "Hello, Rin." He said, keeping his distance. "Would you like to talk about something?" He sat on the ground, his normally loud and sunny disposition nowhere to be found. She contemplated whether or not she should talk to him considering it was near the end of dinner time, but opted to talk to him as she likely would have food saved for her, either by Hanei or Totsuka. She walked over to where he sat and made herself comfortable a little ways from him. She fiddled with her fingers as the silence fell upon them both.

"You... you're hurting aren't you?" He suddenly said that for the second time, she whipped her head around to look at him, eyes widening. "No." She said, adamant that she had already moved on in her mind and she doesn't have to rely on him of all people to listen to her. He remained quiet but shot her an unbelieving look as she pursed her lips. "Not anymore." She said as an afterthought, voice meek as suddenly, she wasn't so sure anymore. Was she finished mourning for herself? For her past life? Was she even properly doing it? Slowly, her head lowered as the ground suddenly looked interesting. "You're still so young, Rin. No need to carry all your burdens alone." He said as he pulled grass from the ground, not paying her any attention. She choked on her breath and shakily exhaled, opting to pull grass too.

"No one would understand why I am doing this." She whispered as her hands stopped moving. "I'm not stupid," she told him, "—you might tell me to explain it to you for you to understand, but I know. You would never understand." She said, voice cracking as she thought about countless nights just thinking about what would happen if she told Hanei about her real self, if she told Totsuka about her knowledge, if she told Gai that his father would die protecting him.

If she told Kakashi to treasure his team so he wouldn't end up all alone and broken.

"How are you so sure?" He asked, finally craning his head so he was looking at her, plucking grass. "Sure of what?" She retorted, knowing full well what he meant. "Even if I don't understand instantly, it doesn't mean that I'll never." He reasoned as she turned and stared at him with such intensity he almost flinched. She knew, she was slowly slipping. She didn't want to, but could you blame her? Blame _him_? Her problems and secrets were slowly creeping up on her and she didn't even know what to mind first. She was losing this fight and she was alone. _You don't have to be alone_ , whispered the small voice of hope at the back of her head, and she prayed to whatever deity out there to help her choose the right thing to do.

She exhaled and told him a story.

"Once upon a time, in a place where there were no shinobi or chakra, there lived a boy with a weak heart. He was born to a mother who earned her living through selling her body, and a father whose job was one many considered bad and immoral. He had nothing his father could be proud of, while his mother was just starting to get her life back. He had no one, besides people who only catered to him and his needs because of his place in their society. That society had a difficult mindset, and that mindset was kill or be killed, take or get taken from, hurt or get hurt." She took a large inhale and slowly tapped her fingers against her knees as she calmed herself and continued the story.

"He was lucky to be born to a man with such high standing, and did his best so his father could be proud of him. He knew his father was disappointed, for he had a weak heart and couldn't even climb stairs without getting dizzy. He wanted to show his sincere apologies because of how he was, and did everything he could to show how sorry he was that he was weak. One day, in a self-defense training gone wrong, he ended up in the hospital, an impromptu surgery that failed." She curled up on the ground, doing her very best not to cry.

"There were so many things he wanted to do, so many things he could have done, and so much more that he would have changed if he was given a chance. All of those chances were ripped away from him just because he had a defective heart. He died that day, looking at his father's back that was turned to him as death dragged him." Dai was quiet as he absorbed what she was telling him, and opened his mouth to ask before he was cut off.

"Or so he thought. He was snatched from, and he was still hurting. He didn't know where he was or what happened to him. He was still alive, and it seemed that he was given another chance. And now, here she was, still grieving as her whole life and what she was was ripped away from her, fate forcefully shoving unto her a life that she never wanted, a life that she didn't need. But now she has to, because she can. She can make changes to the world, make it less bloody and less kill-for-the-kill-count place for her fellow children." At this point she didn't care if Dai understood what she was trying to tell him, and what she implied but she was desperate to get it off of her chest.

"She was given a chance to do what she couldn't do, change what she couldn't change and help those she couldn't help. She wasn't ready to do all of these, yet she is forced to, for lives are on the line. She was alone and grieving, lost and confused, but it doesn't mean that she was not trying to be strong for taking all of it in stride." She felt tears prickling her eyes and she shut them close, slowly rocking herself on the ground. "But sometimes," she said as she felt warm arms wrap around her little body yet she still continued as Dai slowly rocked her side to side, "—sometimes, being strong was all she could do because she was desperate, feeling her own sanity snapping because she tried, no, _wanted_ to let the others keep theirs." Her voice cracked at the end and she felt the man tense in understanding, arms shielding her from the moonlight.

"Sometimes, the strong need protection and help too." A deep, familiar voice said as she turned her blurry vision to where silver hair shone in the moonlight. Sakumo stood infront of them and he knelt down, hand going up and patting her head. She didn't sense him nearby but what could you expect from the man that was once Konoha's pride?

"We may not understand now but we can work on it. You're not alone anymore, Rin. You've got your own little family here to help you." He said as Dai stood up with her still wrapped in his arms, and she wiped her tears away with the hem of her shirt. "Besides, the Power of your Youth shall prevail in the end! Gender does not matter!" Dai said in encouragement as Sakumo her to carry in his arms. "Thank you." She whispered as she accepted her forced fate, but didn't say anything else. "You're always allowed to be weak, Rin. Being strong is being able to admit that you need help, not being able to do it all alone." Sakumo reasoned as she felt a new set of tears run down her cheeks. "Okay, okay." She said as she felt her stomach rumble, and pushed Sakumo so she would be let down. Once her feet touched the ground, she fiddled with her hands and bowed. "I'm really thankful for everything you have both done today." She said, hoping her sincerity successfully came across. "You're welcome. Now, let's get you home now. It's almost nine in the evening." Dai said as he led the way, babbling about his students' progress so she could be distracted. She smiled and let herself get drowned by various training regimen options and went along with it.

She had allies now. She had family. And that was all the incentive she needed to put up with the clusterfuck she's living in.

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Hiruzen massaged his temples as he stared down at the papers that held the news he dreaded. Iwa nin and some Kumo sleeper agents had been found on their borders, with no indication of real defection or desperate measures against Konoha. Files upon files of fake identity cards stared back at him and he fought off a grimace as one more caught his eyes. He had been putting it off for a few hours now but he couldn't help himself. On his table, was Nohara Rin's birth file. It stared at him with obvious indifference, what with being _paper_ and all. He sighed and open the folder containing the little girl's documents.

 **Nohara Rin, 5**

Father: Deceased

Mother: Deceased

Remaining relatives: N/A

The little girl was currently under Shiokaze Haru's wing, as she had said when they met up, but one thing caught his eye.A note with a sign from his prized student, Orochimaru at the bottom of the second page. He skimmed over it and he schooled his features into a blank one.

 _enough spiritual chakra to be mid to high chuunin, physical chakra the same as the average genin. gifted._

 _-O_

A child with enough spiritual chakra to rival a chuunin? Physical on par with a graduated _wartime_ genin? _Gifted_? He frowned as he remembered meeting one of the civilians with the genes more suited for the shinobi lifestyle, but he ended up in the mental ward of the Hospital for he couldn't tame the overflow of chakra that flowed through his very veins. He saw things, and became violent, unable to control himself. There were reasons some civilians are encouraged to become shinobi, not because they had talent, but because they may become hazards when left alone. Rin definitely showed her streak of violence, but he was sure she was accepted into the academy. Did she see things? His frowns deepened as he thought it through.

If so, he had to make her graduate early so she could use all those pent up energy so she couldn't be harmful to her fellow villagers. War children always grew up to be particularly violent or eccentric, but he hoped this problem doesn't apply to the little girl, considering her mental evaluation hasn't been recorded as of now. Records only become important when one enters the academy or reaches the age of 8 in civilian solitude. He caught wind of gossip that Hatake Sakumo had volunteered to pay for a mental psyche for the child but couldn't do so legally when her formal guardian came barging in and escaped with the little girl. He may have to talk to the child again to make her go get one.

For a child not even formally a genin, she sure was giving him a lot more trouble than most jounin and chuunin. He figured his stress may be stemming from, and was sure it must be because of wartime pressure and tension. Border patrols were becoming more and more dangerous as intruding nin trespassed and fought his men. Jiraiya stared at him as he put the Nohara girl's file and stared right at him. "And the situation at Amegakure?" He asked as his student visibly tensed and aged at the same time. He felt sorry, for he was tasked with such important missions and not get proper breaks.

"Something is going to happen. Hanzo, he... I don't think Amegakure is stable." He said, tiredness leaking out of his form and he looked more like an old man rather than a bachelor the same age as Senju Tsunade. He pursed his lips and he stared at nothing blankly, promptly spacing out to manage his thoughts. If ANBU with Konoha's famous tattoos get caught sniffing around the place, it would be another front they have to be careful of. One man appeared on his thoughts but decided against it, for he didn't want to have to result to using force on the small village, and considered _him_ as a last resort. He knew he'd be getting quite the nagging from the Council but they would have to trust his judgement now. Certainly, he became Hokage because somehow, the Nidaime saw something in him and not in Danzo. He knew his old friend was brutally efficient, but sometimes, you just need to be efficient. Not everything that is perfect is good. If it went too good, the Shinobi population would become tense as something too good in the middle of war was hard to believe. Maybe if he sent someone people believed in? Orochimaru or Hatake Sakumo, maybe? The both of them? He snapped back to reality and thought he'd have to pull anther all nighter to get things running. Jiraiya was still looking distressed and he slowly relaxed when Hiruzen pulled something out of his drawer.

"Here," he said, handing Jiraiya a blank notebook. "—relax and write the next instalment of your series." He grinned as his student leered lecherously as he held the blank notebook in his hands, pen already scratching the top. "Okay, okay!" He giggled as he dismissed himself and went who knows where cough _onsen_ cough. He pulled out his pipe from his tobe and lit it up, leaning on his chair and closing his eyes. Ah yes, even the Hokage needs to calm down sometime in the day. He had to have a clear head, he thought, for war doesn't fix and win itself.

He looked out the window facing the Hokage mountain, wearily looking at his own face carved at the side of the mountain cliff, beside his respected teacher. "What would you and the Shodai do in these trying times, sensei?" He asked out loud and wondered if he would ever get an answer to his questions.

He sure hoped no one would try his patience or he will wage war. _Believe it._


End file.
